Page 74 of Secrets Beneath the Waves
“I’m fine,” she said quickly. “Rollerblading accident. I hit some gravel and went flying.”
She told him to sit on the couch, while she glanced around the room to make sure she hadn’t left any evidence of her CIA life lying around. “Make yourself comfortable. I’ll be right back.”
In the bathroom, Ellie splashed cold water on her face. Her reflection stared back, pale and tense.The water soothed her burning hands.
What should she do? Going out meant dragging Mark into the crosshairs. Suggesting they stay home and order in meant waiting for danger to find her. Neither option felt safe. She gritted her teeth, forcing herself to decide.
And what if he was the mole? He could also tell the Iranians where she lived.
The smart thing to do was to send him home. Make up some kind of excuse. That’s what she intended to do. She needed to find a place to stay tonight before it got too late.
When she returned to the main living room, Mark was flipping through a book on her coffee table. He looked up and grinned. “Are you going somewhere?” He pointed to the suitcase and duffel bag by the door.
“Yeah,” she said, forcing a casual tone. “Business trip. Just a couple of days.”
“I’ll miss you.” His sincerity hit her like a sucker punch, making her stomach twist with guilt.
Lying to Mark had become second nature, but that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt. He deserved better than half-truths and feigned smiles, yet she couldn’t let him into the chaos that was her life.
No way he was the mole, she decided. He was the only thing untouched by the darkness she carried, and she wanted to keep it that way. Protecting him meant keeping her distance, no matter how much it felt like she was splitting herself in two.
“I’ll miss you too,” she said finally, hating how hollow the words sounded.
“Ready to go?” he asked.
She didn’t have the heart to cancel the date.
“What if we ordered in?” she asked. At least at home, she was on her turf with lots of ways to protect them. She had a small arsenal in the duffel bag.
His pouty lip and the hurt in his eyes made her immediately regret the question.
“I have reservations at my favorite place. Remember the one I told you about? It’s hard to get a table. I wanted it to be a surprise.”
Ellie hesitated as the words lodged in her throat. She wanted to say no, to get out of there, to stay safe.
“Yeah. Right. I remember,” she said, the lie burned on her tongue.
She took a deep breath and steadied herself.You can’t let fear control you,she told herself. What were the odds that the Middle Eastern men would be driving around looking for her tonight at local restaurants?
They were regrouping, scrambling to cover their tracks after the botched attack. At least that’s what she was counting on.
Yet the gnawing in her gut persisted. Was she dragging Mark into something he didn’t deserve? And she really wanted to spend time with him.
Reckless, as her dad had said.
“Alright,” she blurted, before settling the argument in her mind. “Let’s go.”
As they stepped outside, Ellie scanned the street again as her heart hammered in her chest. Every shadow, every car, felt like a potential threat.
She painted her smile on like armor, but in her mind, she calculated what she’d do if a threat appeared out of nowhere. She walked slightly in front of Mark, putting herself between him and where she thought the threats might come from.
Mark took her hand when they reached his car, but the slight pressure sent a jolt of pain up Ellie’s arm. She winced and quickly pulled away before he could notice.
The problem was that he did notice.
“Ellie, did you hurt your hands too?”
She forced a light laugh, shaking her head. “Yes. When I fell, I burned them on the hot concrete and scraped them on the gravel.”
