Page 81 of Sweet Surrender
“I take it you’ve not seen him during any of these…incidents?” Blake said, looking through the sketches again.
“Not since he last came to the bar,” Beau replied.
“We couldn’t get any prints off the last note he sent but maybe we’ll get something from this and see if there’s anything in his house we can match the handwriting to.”
“Has he been home?” Taylor asked.
“Not that we’ve seen. He’s still in the area, we got a hit on his credit card but we got there too late. We’re pulling all the local CCTV to see if we can find anything. We will find him, I promise. I won’t fail either of you,” Blake said, an edge in his voice.
“I know you won’t, B,” Taylor nodded.
“Just keep doing what you’re doing. He’s already teasing us. He’ll come out of the shadows and we’ll get him,” Blake said.
After Blake left, Taylor went right back behind the bar, throwing herself into work while Beau kept a close eye on her. When it became really busy he jumped behind the bar to help her out, pouring drinks, laughing with customers and keeping everyone happy. Eventually when there was a lull, he dragged her out from behind the bar and pulled her onto the little dancefloor, desperate to be close to her, to hold her.
“You need a break, and a smile,” he murmured, wrapping his arms around her. She smiled up at him, her arms eagerly circling his neck. He began swaying them, a feeling of peace settling over him. Just as contentment at being with her washed over him, his doubts from earlier invaded his brain again. Could she have feelings for him? Could she want-
“Kiss me,” she demanded, pulling him out of his romantic thoughts.
“What?”
“Kiss me. I’m asking you now. Have your reward or whatever, and kiss me,” she said. Her hands linked behind his head and tried to pull him down.
He’d longed for this moment, where their lips would finally meet but something felt off. It wasn’t intimate or the moment he imagined. The urgency in her eyes made him wary; it was all wrong. He tightened his muscles, stopping her.
“What’s happening? Why now?” he asked.
She looked around them. “Because look how many people are here, it’s public,” she said. “Because if he’s still watching then he’ll see us and know it’s serious.” Guilt lay beneath her words.
Hurt crawled through him. She didn’twantto kiss him. Wasn’t desperate for his kiss even after all these years. She was justusinghim to hurt Dale. Using him like other women had used him in the past. The irony of the situation wasn’t lost on him. He had tried to get her to do the exact same thing weeks ago, only he wasn’t intimate with her then, his feelings weren’t involved.
“So you only want to kiss me to make him jealous? You can break your rules when it suitsDalebut not for me?” Her mouth opened to respond but he was too angry. “You want touseme?”
She reared back at his anger and he regretted how much hurt had slipped into his tone, not wanting her to know how it affected him.
Her brows knitted in confusion. “I hate to break it to you but what do you think we’ve been doing this whole time?”
He gritted his teeth.That was different.“But I thought-”
“You thought what?”
“Nothing,” he said and pulled away. “I’ll be back in a minute.”
He raked a hand through his hair and left her on the dancefloor, heading to the bathroom. He needed a minute to pull his pride back together. To forget all the times someone had used him before. Telling himself that this was different, that Taylor was different. But this hurt more than any other time.
*
Taylor served her last few customers, looking over her shoulder again at Beau. Something was off with him. She had clearly upset him during their dance but she didn’t know how. He’d said she was using him but Taylor hadn’t intended to make him feel like that at all.
Yes, their agreement meant she was using him now, but he knew about it and had agreed to it. And hell, they were both benefiting from it, so what was the problem? The only reason she had asked him to kiss her was because she was desperate for this whole thing to be over so that she didn’t have to keep looking over her shoulder for Dale any longer. So that she and Beau could continue on in peace…
Wait, no.
Once this was all over, she and Beau wouldn’t be doing this anymore. A sharp lance pierced her chest and she rubbed it away, shaking her head to dislodge her thoughts.
There had been a second reason she suggested they kiss. Shewantedhim to kiss her. She wanted his kiss so badly but didn’t know how to drop her walls and communicate it to him without it being such a big deal. If it was in a public place, then it took the significance out of this as the first kiss she had experienced since they were teenagers. That way, he wouldn’t realize what he was beginning to mean to her.
If she kissed him, she would be breaking the only rule she ever had.A rule put in place after the last time you kissed him,her brain reminded her. None of this was helping. She was more confused than ever.
