Page 110 of Revelry
“And let me guess, he asked you to speak to me. To try and get through to me. He wanted you to help him out and you said ‘sure’, meanwhile becoming as thick as thieves?” He sprang off the bed and started pacing.
If I wasn’t so worried about how he was reacting, I would be marveling at how good he looked in those tight boxers, straining to hold him in.
“Well…it might be nice to have a conversation—” I began.
“Perfect. Fucking perfect, Gertrude. You’re choosing his side? I can’t believe this!”
I lifted to my knees on the bed, reaching for him but he stepped away. “No, that’s not it at all.”
“It sure sounds like that!” he snapped, facing me, his fingers clicking continually with his agitation.
“No, Tate. I told him I wasn’t comfortable doing that. I said no and he understood. He didn’t try to push it or anything, he immediately backed off.”
Tate snorted in derision. “Oh well that means he’s such a nice guy then, doesn’t it?”
“That’s not what I’m saying. I’m just saying…look your brother wanted to meet you and I have a bleeding heart so—”
“So, you interfered?” Tate snapped.
I recoiled. “Jake is just a child, what happened isn’t his fault, Tate. He didn’t ask for this any more than you did and he wants to meet you, you’re his family.”
“Do I look like I care? Family hasn’t exactly been great for me,” he snarled. I reared back, shocked at his reaction. “Why would I want to meet him? Why would I want to have a relationship with him?”
I looked around, floundering for a response. “Because maybe he’s curious about you?”
He fixed me with a cold look. “Like I said, do I care?”
A chill swept through me at his detachment. “Tate, this isn’t you. I know you’re not big on people and socializing but, you’re notmean.”
He spun away, his fists clenching but there was an air of sadness about him that I hadn’t seen since I first returned to Reverence.
“Do you feel guilty?” I asked quietly.
His stare whipped to me and fire flashed in his silver gaze. “No.”
I shook my head because, yes, he did. It was then that I saw just how much anger and resentment he still had over what happened. He continued pacing, his fingers clicking over and over again. Guilt swamped me that I’d caused his OCD to flareup. But this also made it evident that he needed to resolve the situation with his father and half-siblings to move forward and control his impulses, to resolve his issues.
“I think you need to get closure on this whole thing. And the way to do that is to face your father. This anger and bitterness you’re carrying around will continue to hurt you and those around you, unless you find a way to cope and move on.”
“Stop Gertrude, just stop it. You’ve pushed and pushed me these last few months and I’ve let you. I’ve indulged you, but it ends here.”
I flinched. “You’veindulgedme?”
“Stay out of it, it isn’t your business. You’re not my girlfriend, you’re not a part of my life, it’s nothing to do with you.” His words whipped from him and each one ricocheted off my bleeding heart. “I wouldn’t push you to make amends with your father.”
My stomach dropped. “That’s completely different.”
He stood there, chest heaving with all his anger. His eyes pleaded like he wished he could take those words back, but he’d said them.
I could feel tears forming and I pushed out a shaky breath.
“Okay Tate, I hear you. I won’t get involved in your life anymore, especially if I’m not a part of it.” My lip wobbled but I wouldn’t cry in front of him. If I wasn’t part of his life, then I didn’t want him to see how much he affected me. “I just wanted to help you.”
His head dropped back, and he cursed before he stormed out of the room and then I heard the bathroom door slam.
I knew the conversation was over and I didn’t know what to do. Did I stay, did I go? What was he expecting? We were in that awkward phase of on the edge of something between us, but we also hadn’t discussed it. I heard the shower turn on and decided to wait and see, he might cool down and be open to talking.
I sat in bed, waiting and eventually he appeared, water dripping from his hair, a towel slung low on his hips. He didn’t look at me as he entered the room, he just rummaged for his clothes and got dressed. He was freezing me out, just like my ex did and I was motionless.
