Page 29 of So Worth More
“Yeah, you’re right, it just feels weird. But we aren’t on a romantic date. This is a friends thing, so, yeah…”
He let out another chuckle, “It’ll be fine, Andy. If not, you get a new friend, a nice evening out, and a perfectly tailored tux.” The laughter vanished from his voice. “Time to show Will what he’s missing out on.”
Twenty Four - Will
Far too early on Sunday morning my phone ringing woke me from the little sleep I’d managed to get. I was sure I’d set it to do not disturb, but lack of sleep had left my brain foggy. It took me a minute to realize that if it was ringing, then it was important. A strange foreboding feeling played over me when I saw it was my mom.
“Hey Mom, everything okay?”
“Will,” came her frantic voice, I could hear panicked breaths, “have you seen Alex?” a lead weight settled in my chest. Alex. Of course it was about Alex.
“What’s going on?” I asked hesitantly. I was supposed to be arranging to meet with him as part of my therapy, but kept putting it off, reluctant to spend any time with him. Dr. Arnold had been incredibly patient with me, but I could see that it was beginning to wear thin.
“He’s left Helena and Joseph. She gave him some news yesterday and he just left. He didn’t come home last night. I don’t know where he is and he won’t answer his phone for me.” Everything seemed to stop. I couldn’t hear the traffic outside; I didn’t seem to be breathing.
“What?” I gasped out before pure rage filled me. How could he? After everything he had put me through for Helena, how could he just up and leave her? It didn’t make any sense.
Distantly, I could hear Mom talking about them having troubles, trying counseling, something about a separation, but it didn’t really register. “Mom,” I interrupted, “I’ll call some people and see if I can find him. Could you send me his number? I don’t have it anymore. Not since I changed mine.” I paused to get myself together. “What do you want me to say to him?” I took a deep breath; this last question was so difficult for me to ask. “Do you want him to go back to her?”
I could hear her crying quietly, probably trying to muffle the noise so she could keep it from me. “No,” she managed to get out, “I think it’s best that they are done.” A sniff, then, “I think there’s some things you need to know, but maybe they need to come from your brother. Do you think there is any chance you would hear him out?” Her tone was gentle, but I could feel how desperately she wanted this from me. The last five years with things as they were with us had been hard on mom and my little sister, Matilda.
I sighed, “I dunno, Mom,” was my honest answer. Maybe it was time to clear the air with Alex; Dr. Arnold certainly thought so. There was nothing between Helena and I except hurt feelings now. I’m not sure I ever really loved her in the way I was supposed to, but I’d been about to marry her, and she’d broken my heart. That, and ruined my relationship with my brother forever. I just wasn’t sure if I wanted my brother in my life after what they had put me through. Either of my brothers, since they’d both betrayed me.
I got off the phone after assuring her there were people that Alex used to be in contact with that he might go to. She’d already tried his most recent friends before calling me, showing that she was really worried if she thought that Alex would come here. The guy had plenty of money, he could’ve taken a vacation for all I knew, but mom had said that Helena had his passport so he hadn’t left the country.
Why they were making so much of it, I didn’t know. Not until I had called Christian, who had been Alex’s best friend up until he suddenly married my fiancée. I’d been both shocked and touched that Christian had come down on my side of things, and we had kept in touch ever since. At one point I’d considered him one of my closest friends.
Christian had always been one of those guys that didn’t repeat gossip. He hated liars and cheats. He didn’t exaggerate. If he told you something, it was a true fact. So when he told me that my brother had been having mental health issues, and had possibly had some sort of breakdown, I’d been floored. I spent so long unable to speak that Christian thought the call had dropped and he’d called me back.
Alex had gone to Christian over a year ago to make amends. Christian had always looked up to Alex, with the way he looked after us with our father often being absent from our lives. So he’d taken it hard when it turned out that Alex and Helena had betrayed me so horribly. Christian couldn’t understand how my apparently loving brother had done me so wrong. He and Alex had a massive argument over it and hadn’t spoken until Alex appeared at Christian’s door asking for help putting things right.
Father had been proud of Alex for taking what he wanted, and for a long time I avoided my father, horrified that he could applaud one son for ruining the life of another. Hadn’t my happiness meant anything to him? Charlie seemed to think this was something to copy, the little piece of shit. Mom had been torn between warring sons, but thankfully Matilda, who had only been thirteen at the time, was kept from most of it. I’d cut off half of my family for my sanity.
Christian had appeared at the place I’d shared with Helena a week after their announcement and helped me pick up the pieces. In some ways Christian had replaced Alex as the man that I looked up to.
We talked for awhile and for the first time in a long time I found myself opening up. In truth, I’d been avoiding calling or meeting up with Christian since stuff had started with Andy, for fear of his judgment. Now though, I told him about Andy, how I’d kept him at length because nothing good in my life was permanent. About therapy, and how much I had missed my brother. He had laughed when I’d clarified I’d meant Alex, not Charlie. That one could eat shit.
Hearing that Alex had been struggling with his guilt, about the realities of a life with Helena made me feel sorry for him. There was still anger there for sure. Deep down, I knew I’d never fully forgive him. Never properly trust him, but was there a part of me that could put it aside? Maybe have Alex in my life again?
Our call was interrupted by the front desk calling. Christian hung up after assuring me I’d be the first to hear if Alex appeared.
“Mr. Petraki? There is another Mr. Petraki here, saying he’s your brother and asking if he could come up. Shall I put him on the list?” Earl, the desk attendant asked.
“Could you ask if it’s Alex or Charlie, please?”
“One moment sir,” there were a few seconds of hold music before “Alex, sir.”
“Let him up and put him on the list.”
“Of course, sir.”
I thanked Earl and quickly went to straighten up and text Mom that Alex was here. She must have been holding her phone, because she tried to call immediately, but I sent the call to voicemail. Quickly texting back that I’d call when Alex had left, I told her that I’d talk to him and see if I could help him or convince him to go to her place.
I didn’t say he didn’t deserve any kindness from me but that I was willing to hear him out. Therapy must be working because I was curious about how it all happened, how long it’d been going on.
Alex rang the bell and when I opened the door it was to a man that was a shadow of his former self. He was thin, in a hollow sort of way, like the life had just drained out of him. Stress had aged him; the hair around his temples more grey than our shared dark chocolate brown. There were fine lines around his eyes and some crinkling around his forehead. I don’t think I’d seen him in jeans and a t-shirt in about a decade, and both were crumpled, like he’d slept in them.
I stepped back to let him in and headed to the kitchen to make some coffee and maybe find some snacks, with Alex trailing behind me silently.
