Page 4 of For All It's Worth
Taking a few sips, I managed to get out, “Will?” He was absolutely the last person that I thought would be here. My brother’s expression was conflicted and I half expected him to leave the room now that I was awake. I wouldn’t blame him if he did.
This was the first time that I’d been in the same room as either of my brothers since after the Ethan incident and the tension was thick between us.
My throat constricted as I thought of all the things that I’d wanted to say to them, Will in particular, over the last few years, but the only thing that mattered was the word I choked out, “Sorry.”
I watched the word land and Will weighed it, judging the authenticity and in my haste to apologize again, my throat spasmed around his name and had me coughing.
He reached over with the cup again, allowing me to take a few sips before withdrawing.
“I really am sorry, Will.” I managed.
Will visibly flinched before restraining his reaction and I wanted to try and apologize yet again but all the energy had fled from me and darkness rushed back in.
When I woke again, only Mom and my sister Matilda were with me.
“Where?”
“Sorry darling, but your brothers had to go home. Alex has Joe, and Andy was looking after him so that he and Will could be here. They’ll come back in the morning,” Mom told me unconvincingly. I doubted that they’d come back now that they knew I was going to be fine. I shared a look with Matty that suggested we both knew that it was wishful thinking.
It was then that I noticed it was dark outside. The blinds were open, showing the city beyond under the glow of street lights.
Trying to move into a sitting position, I winced as pain flared along my ribs and I was stopped by both my mom and sister pushing me back into the plush pillows.
“Stop, Charlie!” Mom scolded, “You’ll pull your stitches!” Seeing my confusion, she continued. “You were stabbed! Luckily it wasn’t deep and didn’t hit anything. You’ve also got some nasty bruises and cracked ribs.” She paused, looking at me with a worried expression. “Do you remember what happened?”
I wished that I didn’t but I did. I’d been drunk pretty much solidly since the weekend before, when Max, my best friend of ten years, cut all ties with me until I got myself figured out. Demonstrating some tough love, as he called it. He’d never pulled anything like that before so I knew he was deadly serious about it. That didn’t stop me from calling him or texting when I was drunk and lonely, as I’d been before I was mugged.
Unfortunately, I didn’t lose my memory when I was drunk, so I remembered with too much clarity all the shitty things that’d happened or that I’d done…
Max pressing pause on our friendship until I sorted myself out.
The manager of one of my clubs quit because I drunkenly served some new friends some top-shelf liquor, not charging anyone for it.
My housekeeper also quit after finding a used condom on the floor. Again. I admit I felt bad about that. Jessie had always been sweet to me every time she came to clean when I was hungover and I knew that I had to get her back with a massive raise.
A brief flash of memory flickered in my mind of being punched by a jealous boyfriend before I was kicked out of a club, not one of mine since I was persona non grata in my establishments for multiple reasons, and then mugged and left for dead on the street.
“I was mugged.” I finally said my tone flat.
“You nearly died!” Mom’s tone was scandalized. “And you don’t seem to care, Charlie! I couldn’t bear to lose you,” she cried as fresh tears flowed down her face.
“I’m sorry, Mom.” My voice lacked any emotion. I was too tired at this point to care. Everywhere on my body ached and burned.
I wasn’t sure that I really was sorry. My life of late was empty and lonely and it was all my own doing. I wasn’t sure that if I had died anyone would miss me. Mom would for a while but she had two other boys and her baby girl, even if Matty was almost an adult herself.
Would Max miss me? Had he spent this last week feeling like he had lost a limb as I had? Missing Max was like having a gaping wound in my chest and trying to take a full breath. How hadn’t I realized how much I needed him?
“Charlie?” Mom touched my shoulder gently as if it wasn’t the first time that she had tried to get my attention.
“Yeah?”
“I think you should come stay with me for a bit until you heal up.”
“Mom, no. I’ll be fine at my apartment. I have work.”
“No, Charlie. You need proper care and you’re only going to get that at home with your sister and me.”
Dread at the thought of having to live in that house again filled me. “I’m not staying with you.”
