Page 58 of For All It's Worth
Chapter Twenty Four
Charlie
Itwaslatemorningby the time I got up from a night of broken sleep. I’d tossed and turned all night as I tried to figure out what had happened with Max.
On the surface, there wasn’t anything for me to worry about. Someone who knew Max less well would have thought our date was a resounding success, that maybe he’d just been awkward after his orgasm. I knew differently.
The way that Max had escaped from here last night told a very different tale of our first date. I just wasn’t sure what the problem was.
Maybe it was just as simple as he hadn’t wanted to go as far as we had, but he’d been the one to initiate things. I’d just been opening my pants before the denim had strangled my dick. There hadn’t been any expectations there.
It hit me then, that maybe he didn’t know that and he’d felt pressured to take things further than he’d wanted to.
Feeling like scum, I left my bed and hit the shower, wanting to wash away the icky feeling. The water beating down on me eased my tense muscles but did nothing for my conscience.
In between washing and shaving, I thought about how I’d make it up to Max when I saw him later. Henry’s kitchen was larger and better equipped than Max’s, so he said he would come here for our second date. I’d make dinner and apologize. Making a big deal over it was a bad idea. I didn’t want to put Max under any more pressure to behave a certain way. If he wanted to put the brakes on our physical relationship until he was ready, then that was fine with me.
We probably needed to have a proper conversation about what we were to each other, and what we wanted out of a relationship. I had a rough idea from watching Max when he’d dated other guys, but we were older and hopefully wiser. I knew that I wanted something deeper, permanent. So I had to be sure that Max was on the same page.
When I entered the kitchen, Henry was seated at the breakfast bar shoveling granola into his mouth, looking too fresh and alert for a guy that had been out until the early hours. I’d been awake enough to hear him return, though he’d been pretty quiet.
“Morning.”
He gave a head nod and continued chewing while I set about making my breakfast of eggs and toast.
Henry was pretty much the ideal roommate. Clean and tidy. Didn’t party till late all the time. In deference to my alcohol issues, there was nothing alcoholic in the apartment. He’d shrugged it off casually, saying he wasn’t a big drinker anyway. But it’d meant a lot to me that he’d done it so easily. We got along great and I was slowly learning not to trigger his PTSD.
I’d been coached by his sister, Holly, never to approach him from behind and touch him, and to always announce my presence first and come at him from where he could see me. He didn't have massive problems with PTSD but would react badly if caught by surprise.
I opened the butter and realized I didn’t have enough for my toast. In fact, I was low on a lot of things, so I’d have to go to the market before I started dinner for Max.
Going along the side of the breakfast bar, I caught Henry’s attention. “Can I use your not butter, butter stuff? I’m out.”
“Sure, you don’t need to ask. Just replace anything you finish.” His voice was always a pleasant rumble.
“Thanks, man. I’ll pick up some more of your dairy-free stuff when I go to the store. Is there any particular brand or anything?”
“Oh, um, you don’t have to do that.” I started to interrupt and he glared at me. “I’ll write you a list,” he conceded.
We may have only lived together for a week, but Henry had learned early on that some things weren’t worth arguing with me over. He vastly undercharged me for my room and utilities, so I made up for it by getting groceries. The first time I’d gotten things that he couldn’t eat without realizing it, I’d accidentally made him sick by using dairy in a recipe when I’d cooked for us. I still felt shit about that days later.
“Oh, Max is coming over for dinner. I hope you don’t mind.”
“Max is welcome here any time. No issues here. I’m glad that you two are taking a shot at things.”
“Yeah, it’s tricky though. I think I messed up already.”
“What d’you mean?”
I explained the situation and Henry frowned in the direction of the couch, making me laugh.
“Don’t worry, it’s clean and we won’t do that again. Anything sexual stays in the bedroom.”
“This is your home too, so whatever.” He shrugged. “Just don’t leave anything that you wouldn’t want your mama to see.”
There was silence for a moment. “Just talk things through with Max, maybe it isn’t as bad as you think. Slowing it down isn’t a bad idea, though. I’ll be out of your hair since I’m closing at the gym tonight.”
“Won’t be a late one since Max is opening Books & Biscuits tomorrow, and I don’t think he’s ready to sleep here.”
