Page 44 of Code Mages & Empty Pages
I laughed and nudged his foot under the table. “A bit of both, maybe.”
He hesitated for a second, then asked, “Did you get any writing done last week? Or was it all work and no words?”
The question surprised me. “A little bit. Not as much as I wanted, but… I’m getting there.”
“Really? That’s great. So, you went for the Dragon guy, right? He’s not a Wolfman like me?”
“No, he isn’t. I don’t want to share you with my readers, Luc.”
It felt strange to admit, but I needed to say it. Whatever this was between us, it worked. “With Hector, it was different. I was never really into him.”
A slow, teasing grin spread across Luc’s face. “So, you’re into me?”
I huffed, half amused, half flustered. “The colleagues-with-benefits arrangement we have didn’t tip you off?”
I regretted the words the second they left my mouth. Luc’s face fell, and I suddenly wished I could take them back and tell him how I really felt. He let out a soft sigh.
“It was just a joke, Dawn. I know you like sleeping with me.”
I wanted to correct him. Whatever this was, it stopped being casual weeks ago. He had to know that. Luc and I were as different as possible, but we fit together like two connecting puzzle pieces, from our quick encounters in unlikely places toquiet evenings with Ruffles on the couch. Being with him made me happier than anything or anyone else ever had. I didn’t want him to give up everything he enjoyed just because I was around. So, I found ways to bring our interests together.
One of the best pastimes we had found, at least that wasn’t sex, was sharing snacks while I knitted on the small couch in his room and he gamed with his guild.
“Wanna come back to bed with me?” Luc asked after we’d finished eating and cleared the table.
“Yeah,” I said, still a little unsure. “I’ll just go feed Ruffles first, okay?”
“Sure. I’ll wait for you.”
I felt his eyes on me as I scooped Ruffles’ wet food into his dish. I crouched to stroke our purring fairy cat while he ate, murmuring, “Good night, Ruffles. See you in the morning.”
“Night, Ruff.” Luc leaned over my shoulder and scratched Ruffles’ back. I leaned into him, hoping he’d understand that this wasn’t just about sex for me. I wanted all of it: him, Ruffles, and this little home we’d created.
Luc was quiet. He kept his emotional distance until we were both naked and tangled in each other. Only then did the tension fall away, and my Luc came back to me.
The next morning, I woke up wrapped in his arms. For a moment, everything felt right. He’d insisted I get up and put on my bonnet in the night, but he’d coaxed me back into his bed afterwards. At some point, sharing his bed had become the norm after sex. Maybe it had always been more than physical between us. It was wild that we still pretended to be colleagues with benefits when, for weeks now, we’d been so much more.
But there was the reality of my cottage waiting for me. The end of our time together loomed over me like a thundercloud. I knew that when the storm finally arrived, it would tear my world apart. The idea of taking Ruffles out of his new home and awayfrom Luc made me feel sick. My cottage used to be my haven, the thing I was most proud of. It was Horace’s book that gave me the freedom to buy it, and even though I hadn’t managed to repeat that kind of success, the house meant everything. Or it had.
I couldn’t imagine going back. I didn’t want to be without Luc while Ruffles chased butterflies or curled up on the couch.
Gerry had said the fungus would take weeks to clear, weeks of walls coming down and going back up. I found myself hoping it would take longer. I dreaded being alone there. It would feel so empty. I used to picture Ruffles sunning himself in my garden, but now, when I imagined it, I saw him here with us.
How do you tell your colleague with benefits that you want to stay for real, that you want more, when you’ve only known him a few weeks?
I didn’t have an answer. Every morning, the thought of leaving tied my stomach in knots. I knew we’d still see each other at work, but it wouldn’t be the same. Ruffles would miss him, too. I didn’t want to take the cat tree Luc had built, but I couldn’t bear to leave it behind as a reminder of what we’d had.
When Luc thought I couldn’t hear, he talked to Ruffles like he was part of his guild. I recognized the slang now. Sometimes, he’d turn fetching a tool from his work shed into a quest for them both. We’d just started letting Ruffles explore the garden, and he loved chasing butterflies and lounging in the shade under Luc’s neat perennials. Once, in a moment of madness, we even talked about building raised beds so I could have my cottagecore fantasy.
I couldn’t imagine leaving him.
“Hey, Roe.” Luc’s voice was soft against my ear. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah, I’m okay,” I lied.
He didn’t push. He just pulled me closer. Wrapped in his warmth, I finally drifted back to sleep. I wished the morning would never come.
Chapter 16
