Page 69 of The Home Grown
She said no. Not maybe, not let me think about it—just flat-out, clear as day, no.
Though what was I expecting? For her to leap into my arms and declare her unwavering attraction for me?
I wish.
Eventually, I gave up and went for a walk. The walk turned into a jog, the jog turned into a 3 a.m. stop at a twenty-four-hour fast-food place, where I ate too much beige food and regretted all my life choices, including the lie I told Coach.
What the hell was I thinking? Obviously I wasn’t, but that never stops me. Ever. The opportunity to see her again thanks to my missing wallet blown into smithereens.
Now not only does my head reel from my conversation with Ellie, but my stomach feels bloated and heavy from the excess of carbs.
I feel like shit in every way.
The only good thing to come from today is the off-ice activity.
A morning of sitting in the media room with the coaching staff before we find out the outcome of the roster—apparently, they don’t usually announce it until the post-season, but something has driven a change in the plan which means it’s even more of an issue that Ellie said no.
It buys me no time.
I had it in my head that Ellie would agree, and Coach would know nothing about my lie. But alas, now I’m hoping he tells me I haven’t made the team, so I needn’t worry about living up to the ruse of being married to a willing wife.
I make it down to breakfast twenty minutes earlier than usual, all thanks to Danny and his plea to meet in the usual spot for a catch up before the rest of the guys get here. Honestly, I don’t know when he became such a nosey bastard, but here we are.
“Well, how did it go?” Danny says before I’ve had a chance to sink down into the seat opposite him.
He looks fresh, like he had an early-morning gym session and sauna, taking full advantage of the hotel facilities. His baseball cap is on the table next to his mug, already full to the brim with tea.
“Let me ask you this—how do you think it went?”
I drop into the seat opposite him and reach for the cafetière of dark roast, grateful that he at least saw the sense to order it for me.
We’re sitting at a table next to the window overlooking the golf course, and typically, we’d spend ten minutes in silence, waiting for the caffeine to kick in while watching the maintenance guys outside. But today, I’m staring at Danny, trying to figure out what he’s going to say next.
“She declared her undying love and wondered why you didn’t ask sooner?” Danny takes a gulp of his tea before grinning like a cartoon cat.
“I’ll keep it simple. She said no.”
I finish making my drink before cupping the mug in both hands; I take a sip.
“Shit. What are you going to do?” he says.
“What do you think I’m going to do?” I reply.
Danny studies me for a moment before offering a suggestion.
“Find someone else?”
“No,” I scoff. “I’m going to persuade her. It’s the only thing I can do. I was thinking … there must be something I can do to tip her decision the other way.”
“It’s a big ask, though—moving in with you and?—”
I bite my lip and shift my attention to the lawn outside.
“Shit,” Danny says. “You didn’t tell her that part of your plan, did you?”
I watch a maintenance guy speeding over the course on a golf buggy, because I know if I make eye contact with Danny, I’ll probably end up crying or something.
I’m pathetic.
