Page 1 of Craved By You
Prologue
I’ve never truly understood the meaning of love.
From a young age, I sought validation through sex with strangers I met online. I craved the feeling of being loved, appreciated, and wanted, even though I knew these men and women felt nothing beyond momentary satisfaction. Some returned, but others vanished, leaving me confused, hurt, and increasingly self-loathing. As an adult, those feelings made the journey to self-love daunting and unclear.
I never seemed to attract the “right” people. Instead, I consistently drew toxic individuals into my life – people who caused me harm rather than offering care. People who exploited my inability to say “no.”
I desperately want to believe things will be different this time, thatheis different.
While my heart pulls me towards him, a deep instinct screams at me to run.
I long to be desired by him, yet I fear he could be my ultimate downfall.
Is that a risk I am willing to take?
Chapter 1
Astrid
“Another person has gone missing after a night out with their friends. Andrew’s family is begging for anyone who has any information on his whereabouts to please, come forward.”
“Andrew, we miss you ple-”
I grabbed the remote and shut off the TV.Why the fuck did I even try watching the news?
I couldn’t handle hearing another case about someone who had gone missing and lately it had been an almost weekly occurrence. My anxiety tried to convince me how easily I could become one of those people someday. If only I was better at marketing, I’d never have to leave the house again and could make a killing doing online sex work. There were plenty of people out there who would pay to be degraded and humiliated through a screen, or for used panties. Unfortunately, none of that was an option for me and I had to pay the bills somehow.
Fuck, I’m gonna be late.
I rushed around the house, gathering my things and hurried out the door. Sliding into the car I glanced in my rearview mirror to make sure my space buns were on point. Thankfully, I didn’t live too far from work, just far enough to be annoying on dayslike this. A quick look at the clock as I drove told me I wouldn’t have time to stop and grab my morning coffee.
My brakes squealed when I came to a stop. I put my car in park in the employee lot while I glanced across the street to see the neon lights of the salon just now turning on.
Whew. I barely made it on time.
I enjoyed my time at Vintage Wave. The salon had a cool, bohemian vibe that attracted clients who aligned with my own personality: chill, free-spirited individuals with eclectic tastes, often appreciating both Nu Metal and Stevie Nicks. It helped make the days pass by at a decent pace and I got to enjoy the work I did, filling my days with shags and vibrant colors rather than basic bobs and balayage.
I stepped out of my car and began to walk away when I realized I left my purse on the passenger seat. I quickly returned to retrieve it. The purse, a unique coffin-shaped design adorned with rhinestones and skull embellishments, had instantly captivated me when I discovered it in The Bat Cave, a gothic boutique near the salon. As a collector of cutesy and whimsical purses, this quirky piece was a perfect addition to my collection.
On my way across the street, puddles splashed beneath my feet and I was glad that I had worn my rain boots today. The bell rang when I opened the door and I was greeted by the salon’s owner, Haileigh, who also happened to be one of my favorite people in the entire universe. Not only did her smile light up a room, but she was the cutest little four-foot-something blonde who had her dimples pierced, was covered head to toe in tattoos, and tended to be the Enid to my Wednesday.
She always rocked out in some of the brightest - make you go blind - neon clothes while I chose to hang out at my station,donned in black everything. My wardrobe usually consisted of band tees and ripped leggings with fishnets underneath, and the perfect pair of platforms to finish off the ensemble but sometimes it included a floor-length maxi-skirt.
Together, we were unstoppable and practically inseparable. Haileigh and I barely tolerated the other stylists who were frequently in and out of the other booth spaces because they couldn’t gain enough clients to fill their books. Even walk-ins would wait until either of us had time or they would schedule an appointment. It had been three years since I started working here, and I couldn’t imagine finding a better space to call my own.
“Hey babe. Loving the fit today!” Haileigh always complimented my outfits, no matter how basic they were. I could probably show up in a trash bag and she would be in my corner, rooting for me. Today I was donning my Vore Ritual band tee with a pair of black shorts, fishnets with skulls on them, and had changed from my rain boots to a pair of flats with spikes on them.
“Hey girl, you’re looking extra bright today!” I scrunched my nose and hip-bumped Haileigh nearly knocking her over, but this was just how we were.
“Someone has to be the sunshine on this cloudy day.” She looked me up and down before quickly walking behind the counter of the front desk and pulling up the day’s schedule. “Wow, you’re a busy lady today. All booked up.”
I proceeded to act like I was shining my nails on my shirt. “What can I say? You’ve got yourself a star in the making.”
“You keep this up and you’re going to be leaving me in the dust to go work at another high-end, hipster salon.” I knew thatshe was making an attempt at a joke, but there was a lot of truth behind it. My leaving was something that she worried about constantly, no matter how many times I objected.
Could I make more money somewhere else? Probably, but this place was everything to me and I would rather make less money and enjoy what I do, than make more and want to toss myself off a bridge.
“Whatever. You know you’re going to drag me out of here in a casket.” I stuck my tongue out at her as the bell rang behind me and a tall, gorgeous, hunk of a man walked through the door, causing Haileigh to practically need to pick her jaw up off the ground.
