Page 81 of We Were Never Lovers
“You were alone,” Sean could see it now, how isolated Jack must’ve felt in all this and with Sean leaving, he wouldn’t have had anyone to back him up if he told Sean the truth and asked him to stay.
Jack blinked back fresh tears. “I was alright. Just worried about you.”
Sean was already shaking his head. “I’m not gonna let that happen to ya again, alright?”
Jack tugged him against his chest. “Nothin’ like this will ever happen again.”
Sean hugged him, but said, “Probably not, but it’ll make me feel better.”
“Okay,” Jack said on an exhale. “Whatever you want.”
“‘Cos we always do what I want?” Sean smiled up at him.
“I always want what you want,” Jack said simply and Sean remembered that being true too.
Sean was tempted to cancel the BBQ. He was back, all of him, and he wanted to sink into that feeling with Jack and only Jack. And Jack was instantly amenable to the idea. His, “Yeah, course,” was so quick it made Sean huff a laugh and kiss him. And kiss him and kiss him.
“But probably better to rip it off like a Band-Aid, all at once,” he said and pulled back.
Jack pushed up onto his elbow, traced Sean’s face with his hand. He was smiling like he’d never stop smiling. “It’s a good opportunity, with everyone together.” He didn’t sound convinced.
Sean groaned. “I wanna be just us.”
“Me too,” Jack replied.
“Ya know, you’re really no help at all,” Sean said and rolled up, pushing Jack onto his back and straddling him. He’d missed this too—knowing exactly how to move Jack, how to tie him up—
“Where’re our toys?” he asked and looked around.
Jack rumbled with laughter underneath him. “I hid ‘em. Can you imagine if I had to explain that?”
Sean cracked up. “Yeah, nah.” He probably would’ve thought Jack was using them with someone else, which would’ve sent him into a rage spiral, which he would’ve taken out on Jack and Jack would’ve stoically taken it without saying a word. Because he’d rather bear the brunt of Sean’s rage than threaten the stability of his fragile mind.
Sean leaned down but stopped just before he kissed him. “I love you, ya know that?” He’d never said it before. Neither of them had.
Jack looked like he was about to cry again. “I love you too.”
“Yeah, I know,” Sean replied, smirking.
Jack laughed, his thick torso rumbling between Sean’s thighs. “When did you know?”
Sean shrugged, kissed him, pulled back. “I reckon when you picked this house for me.”
Jack blushed but didn’t deny it.
“When did you know?” Sean asked and rolled Jack’s nipple between his thumb and forefinger.
“I don’t,” Jack said, arching into the touch, “I don’t know if I did until just now. I hoped, I thought, probably? But we never said.”
Sean frowned. “We’re gonna get better at that.”
“Yeah,” Jack breathed out. He was a sight, red rimmed eyes making the blue starker, his plush lips stretched into a beautiful, radiant smile. Sean wondered how he’d gotten so fucking lucky. He wondered how long he would’ve stayed home if he’d left, reckoned he would’ve been making his way back to Jack pretty quick. Nobody left this.
“And we’re gonna tell people,” Sean reiterated. He groaned and planted his face on Jack’s bare chest. “We can’t cancel.”
“No,” Jack replied, his hand running through Sean’s hair.
“Ben?” Sean asked after a while.
