Page 96 of Eye of the Hurricane
“We actually talked about it last night.” I can’t help the blush and cheek-splitting grin that follows.
“Ooooh, there’s more to it! Tell us!” Ravyn demands.
“Well I asked him how he could be sure that I’d be ready eventually and he told me that he’s done his fair share of dating, probably enough for the both of us. And that it’s never felt like this. So I asked him if it’s not always like this… he said it’s never like this.” I have to bite my cheek to keep from smiling like an idiot. Audra and Luna both squeal.
“We did it! We successfully turned him into a man written by a woman!” Audra cheers.
“Honestly, you have us to thank for this,” Ravyn adds and they clink glasses.
“Did you get on your knees after that?” Luna asks, wiggling her brows at me.
“Jesus, Luna,” I huff. I expect Audra and Ravyn to side with me but instead, there are three sets of eyes looking at me expectantly.
“Okay, fine. No… But we did sleep together after that,” I admit and they all squeal. The statement launches a full night’s worth of questions and tea being spilt.
Chapter 27
Katherine
3 weeks later…Interview day
I feel like I’m staring down the barrel of everything I’ve worked hard for. I’m less than two hours out from my interview with The Sea Dragons and I feel like I’m going to throw up.
Everything in my life has been leading up to this moment. I can’t fail now, I won’t let myself. I’ve sacrificed so much in my life to get here. I don’t want to find out I gave up all of that for nothing.
I never really realized until this year how much I had sacrificed. That’s just the way it always was, I never considered having it any other way. Of course, until Ares walked into my life. He has shown me how fun life could be if I let it be. And I really, really, want to let it be fun. I just have to get this job first.
I’m currently sitting in the parking lot of the athletics facility trying to calm myself down and running through the lists upon lists of practice questions that Jacob gave me. I even found some online. I know that I’m cut out for this, Iknow that I am. Still, there is this nagging fear that I’m not ready.
The time seems to drag but after all of the prep work, I’m finally being called back for my interview. I expect to see Mateo or any of the staff that I have been introduced to in my time shadowing here.
Instead, it’s an unfamiliar face on the other side of the desk. A woman who looks to be somewhere between her fifties and her sixties. She’s very professional looking, she’s got on an all white pantsuit. She reminds me a little bit of my mother and that alone has me psyching myself out. Wondering if she too will think a woman in athletics is ridiculous.
The interview is somehow even more intense than I had thought it would be. I feel like I was asked all of the mainstream questions about my work ethic, how I handle conflict, and how I work with others. Then on top of that, I was asked a million more related to the job itself.
Ninety minutes of nothing but questions. Maybe I wouldn’t feel so damn stressed if she had even cracked a smile. That woman was all business, no pleasure.
This is a level of anxiety I’ve never dealt with before. I manage to put on a brave face through the entire interview and out to my car. As soon as I’m in the car, I fall apart.
All of my fears set in. What if I don’t get it? What if she hated me? What if I’m not qualified? Worst of all, what if I’m totally qualified and don’t get it because I’m a woman?
I’m not crying, although this feels worse than crying. Instead, I’m sitting here trying to steady the tremble of my own hands. I want to call my mom and tell her how fucking scared I am. But she wouldn’t have anything comforting or productive to say.
My second thought is that I want to call Ares. But in what world is it fair to him that I call him freaking out after my interview when I’m the one telling him we can’t be together right now.
Sure, things were great the weekend of the wedding. But it was temporary, nothing has changed. I still don’t have the time for something serious and he still deserves better than that—more than that.
So instead I drive home with shaking hands and a racing heart. When I walk through the door, the soft jingle of a bell collar is a comforting sound. I pick Bellatrix up off the floor and she rubs her face against mine, purring.
It doesn’t settle me the way I want it to. I feel uncomfortable in my skin. Uncomfortable doesn’t even cut it. I feel like I want to claw my way out of my skin. I feel suffocated.
I sit the cat down on the ground, pour myself a glass of wine, and splash cold water over my face. It doesn’t do a thing.
I’m filled with this overwhelming sense of dread. The feeling of suffocating has gone from metaphorical to literal. I can’t fucking breathe.
I’m not proud to say that it’s my first reaction in a crisis. I’d love to say I call Luna. But instead, it’s Ares’ phone number I’m dialing.
“Hey, Audra said your interview was today, how did it go?”
