Page 35 of Take Me
“Ike.”
“Ike who?”
“Ike can rock your world, baby.”
“I’d like to see you try.”
We’ve done this ridiculous schtick since we were kids, but something hits differently now.The fact that we’ve kissed, or that I’ve seen her topless for one-tenth of a second?My brain brews up the memory of her perfect round butt in those boy shorts, and I feel like beating myself over the head with the potato chip can.
Why is this weird, when we’ve seen each other in swimsuits six-million times?We paddle together on the lake every summer, with Erika in a bikini, I presume.I never really noticed.It’s not like I ever once stared at her ass.
Her words from last night bubble up in my brain.
“We’ve been friends for so long that we’ve never really noticed you have boy parts, and I have girl parts.”
I guess it’s just normal that I’m noticing now.It’s all part of having a fake girlfriend, right?
I reach over and turn up the A/C.It’s suddenly way too hot in here.
“Knock knock.”It’s Erika’s turn now.
“Who’s there?”
“Mike.”
Shit.We both know this one, and it’s ringing differently now.
But I’ve got a duty to see it through.“Mike who?”
“Mike Litoris.”She always adds this next part.“Bet you don’t have a clue where I am.”
“Har, har.”I’ve never felt the need to counter before, but I find myself blurting the words.“For the record, I could find it in the dark with both hands tied behind my back.”
Erika looks over and lifts one blond brow.“We’re speaking in general about the clitoris and not my?—”
“Of course.”For fuck’s sake, does she think I’m propositioning her?
But now that I’ve thought it, I can’t stop thinking about it.I need a non-sexual joke pronto.“Knock knock.”
“Who’s there?”
“Centipede.”
“Centipede who?”
“Centipede on the Christmas tree, and now it smells bad.”
She laughs like she always does, seeming relieved we’ve moved on from that sexually charged moment.Or maybe it’s just me thinking like that.
“Knock knock,” Erika says.
“Who’s there?”
“Helda Dick.”
I haven’t heard this one before.“Helda Dick who?”
“I Helda Dick and the wind blew it for me.”She cracks up laughing, smacking her knee with a palm.“Zoe told me that one.I’ve been waiting for the right time to share it.”
