Page 83 of Take Me
“No rush,” he murmurs.“Probably not urgent to break up right away.”
“Okay.”I open my mouth to say more.To tell him the longer we play act like this, the harder it will be let go.I’m already fearful I’ve fallen too hard.That returning to being just friends will hurt more than my breakup with Neil.
But Mason snores softly, his hand on my back, and I let out a breath of relief.I check to be sure he’s asleep before whispering the words I could never be brave enough to say to his face.
“What if we didn’t break up?”
His only reply is a soft, gentle snore, and a twitch as he sinks deep asleep.
Chapter13
Mason
Things feel normal in the days that follow my brother’s wedding.Jake and Cass won’t leave for their honeymoon until after Lucy and Peter get hitched.
Parker and Noah and Dad are still here, so the whole Spencer-King clan spends more time together than we have in years.Even my parents—whose divorce became final last year—seem happy to have the whole clan together.We work as a team to do all the crafty shit required for the next Spencer-King wedding.
There are dinners at Lucy’s, with everyone chipping in food.Mom makes huge batches of soup, crockpots brimming with split pea and corn chowder and chicken with wild rice.Parker shows up with piles of smoked salmon, while Kaleb contributes kale salad and Jake makes his legendary cornbread.We all eat together around Lucy’s big table, wielding glue guns and chalk paint, along with our forks.
Erika’s working long hours at the garage, since Kaleb’s taking time off for family.She comes home exhausted each night, which gives me a chance to offer my services.I’ve got mad massage skills and a penchant for foot rubs, which my fake girlfriend seems to enjoy.I swear they’re not meant to be foreplay, but we somehow wind up naked most nights anyway.Some mornings as well, and even one memorable lunch when she came home with dog treats for Scrumpy.
Suffice it to say, biscuits weren’t the only treat on the menu.God, my girlfriend is great with her hands.
Fakegirlfriend.
I keep forgetting, though clearly she hasn’t.Based on our pillow talk the other night, she’s counting the days to our breakup.I’m on borrowed time, and I know it.Each time I touch her, I’m aware that we’re one more step closer to the split that will break me in two.
Our friendship feels solid, but something inside me craves more.Like now that the genie is out of his bottle, he might not be happy to squeeze his fat ass back inside.
“Tell her, you idiot.”That’s my sister with the heartfelt advice.She’s sipping a beer at my bar while Harper is at her piano lesson.
“Tell who what?”I wipe down a puddle of ketchup with a rag, pretending I don’t have a clue what she means.
“Tell Erika you want to be more than just friends who have sex.”She points at Parker, who’s holding a pint glass on the stool to her left.“You saw them at Jake’s wedding.Tell him it’s pretty damn obvious they’re in love.”
The wordlovepings something inside me.It’s an odd mix of terror and joy that leaves me a little bit queasy.
Parker’s shaking his head as he wisely deploys the youngest kid trump card.“I’m staying out of this,” our kid brother mutters.“She’s a cool chick, though.”
“See?”Lucy turns back to me.“You just need to tell Erika how you feel.What’s the worst that can happen?”
I keep wiping the bar, ignoring the tug in my chest.“Uh, let’s see.She could laugh in my face.”That’s not even close to the worst that can happen.“She could look at me with pity and say she doesn’t have the same feelings.”
“That doesn’t seem likely.”Lucy considers me.“I know it’s scary.You guys have been friends a long time.”
She has no idea just how scary it is.“Erika was part of my life before Mom went off the deep end.I was in hers before her parents’ accident.We’ve been through both our moms’ funerals together—Grandma and Grandpa’s, too.”
Lucy’s eyes shimmer, but she nods like she gets it.“I remember.She read the sweetest poem at Grandma’s service.”
“It’s not just the sad stuff, either.She helped me open Big One’s when everyone else said a town this tiny couldn’t support a brewery.”Our mom—from the grave, though not really—was the only other person convinced I could do it.“I cheered Erika on the whole time she went through mechanic school, and we’ve supported each other through heartbreaks and different relationships.If I fuck that up by making things awkward with feelings—” I shake my head, not willing to consider what that would look like.“I couldn’t stand it if I lost her.”
My voice breaks on that last bit.If Kaleb or Jake were here, they might say I’m being a pussy.
Parker looks up from his beer.“Don’t be a pussy.”
“Gee, thanks.”So much for my sensitive brother.
“I mean it.”He spins his pint glass on the bar, looking thoughtful.“Nobody knows more about hiding important truths than a guy who spent his formative years assigned the wrong goddamn gender.It’s hard as hell to man up and say how you feel.”
