Page 2 of Final Goodbye
Eventually, the emotions would run through me, but now wasn’t the time. Maybe the closer I was to home, to him, my feelings would spill over.
The worst part was, I felt like I would never get there. I was running on no sleep. And between my bar shift and traveling in the early hours, this day—which was really two days—felt like a continuous loop.
The plane landed in Denver, but I still had a daunting three-hour drive ahead of me into the mountains, to my hometown I left years ago. My road trip was quiet, only thoughts of the worst-case scenario running through my mind. My anxiety grew with every mile I got closer to the mountains.
I wasn’t sure if my nerves got worse or better when I saw the sign ahead that read,Welcome to Alpine Peak, Population 6,011. I was back home for the first time in years, and it was all because my dad died.
Regret filled me when I wished I had come back sooner.
I ran away from this small town years ago. I wanted to live in the big city and leave the bad memories behind. Of course, I still saw my family, but I let them come to me. Phoenix was a great place to get away when it got too cold here in the mountains.?From the sounds of it, they didn’t seem to mind the excuse to get out of town.
The last time I saw my family was just over six months ago. They came to Arizona to see some spring training baseball games, take a trip to the Grand Canyon, and every other touristy thing. It dawned on me… that was the last time I saw my dad. We talked all the time through text and video calls, but the last time I hugged him, smelled him… That was months ago.
Lost in thought, I continued to drive toward my childhood home. Everything appeared the same once I turned onto High Street, the main strip through the town, but it definitely felt different being back.
I passed the coffee shop, pharmacy, some local restaurants, and the neighborhood bar,Peaks. Depending on how things went while I was here, I’d probably have to get a temporary job there. High Street wasn’t very big, maybe a mile long of shops, but it had everything you’d need.
It was fall in the mountains. Unlike back in Phoenix, the leaves here were changing color, and the weather was cooler. Yellow and red leaves floated through the air, dropping one by one to the ground, separating from the trees with each breeze.
My parent’s house was just down the street, and before I knew it, I arrived in the gravel driveway. These were the last fewmoments I would have alone. In order to prepare myself, I took a few deep breaths after turning off the engine.
The calm before the storm.?
Minutes had gone by when I finally got out of the car. Heading up to the front door, I didn’t know what I would be walking into, so I grabbed the spare key that had been under the doormat for as long as I could remember.
Yup, nothing had changed.?
Hesitation washed over me, but I turned the key to unlock the door anyway. Cracking the door open, I called out for my mom and brother. “Mom? Chase? Anyone home?”
Chase came walking down the stairs, looking taller than ever, and I couldn’t believe how much he had changed since I last saw him.
I know teenagers are always changing and growing into their own, but it wasn’t just that he was taller, he had grown wider; he looked like he was spending all of his extra time in the weight room. He was almost seventeen and ready to graduate high school.
My parents had him when I was a teenager; you could say they weren’t expecting it. By the time I was out of the house, Chase was still a young boy. We never had the opportunity to grow super close, but I always did my best to stay in contact and ask him how school was going.
Our relationship pretty much consisted of small talk.
“Paige, hey. Mom is lying down; she didn’t get much sleep last night.” He looked defeated coming down the stairs and even more overcome when he hugged me and took a deep breath. That breath sounded like he’d been holding it for quite some time now. His hug was tight, and I could tell he was silently crying by the way he shook in my arms. I wanted to tell him it was going to be okay. I wanted to believe that this was just a sick dream, but I still had very little to go on. All I knew was that ourfather was dead, and I needed to be strong for this family. For Chase, who was sobbing in my arms.
I was clearly still in shock. I felt pathetic. Even my little brother breaking down and crying couldn’t make me shed a tear. I didn’t quite know what to say, so I just stood there silently and hugged my brother like I wished I had hugged my father the last time I saw him.?
I released his body from my arms and looked deep into his saddened eyes. He was the spitting image of our dad, with his deep brown eyes, dark hair, and a strong jawline. With a furrowed brow, I spoke softly. “Let’s have a seat in the kitchen. I’ll make you some breakfast, and we can talk about it?” He silently nodded as we made our way to the kitchen.
I had so many questions, but I wondered if Chase was the right person to ask. Waking my mom wasn’t an option. Sleep was best for her right now. I was exhausted, too, but I couldn’t even imagine how she must have been feeling.
He took a seat at the bar top while I got familiar with the kitchen again. When I opened the fridge, it looked like my mom hadn’t been to the grocery store in a while. I made a mental note to stock the fridge and freezer with some food that wouldn’t go bad right away. There were some bagels and cream cheese, and it would have to be enough for now.?
Setting a bagel in front of Chase, I finally got the courage to ask, “So… Mom called last night, but she didn’t have much to say. Honestly, the conversation was a blur. She told me dad was gone, that there had been an accident and to come home…” Taking a deep breath, I finished, “What happened, Chase? Why am I home? What happened?” I exclaimed, my knuckles turning white from the tightening grip I had on the countertop.
He looked up at me, teary-eyed. “They said it was a hit and run. The police showed up last night and said, by the time theyarrived at the scene, he was gone, and it was clear it was a hit and run.”
I felt the color drain from my face, and tears threatened to escape from my eyes. I’d been through therapy before; I knew it was acceptable to show emotion, especially in a moment like this, but it was almost like my body wasn’t allowing it.
Suddenly, I was Cameron Diaz inThe Holiday. The worst thing in my life could happen and I couldn’t cry. There was a wall built up so high that I couldn’t feel the most devastating emotions.
The tears weren’t falling, but that didn’t mean I wasn’t allowed to be angry at the thought of someone leaving my father for dead on the side of the road.
A fucking hit and run?
