Page 108 of Sinful as They Come
I didn’t know what else to do but kiss him. I leaned forward, closing that small space between us so that I could get to his lips. I heard him groan against me, his heavy hands landing on my waist as he pulled me that little bit closer to him. He was so warm. Always. All of the time. Did he think I didn’t want that? That I couldn’t want that?
His tongue slipped into my mouth, the move so enticing. I let a few whimpers fall from my lips when Sawyer held me tighter, his long fingers holding me in the most delicious grip. I wanted to crawl into his lap and grab his shoulders and run my fingers through his hair – but our current position prevented that. But kissing Sawyer by the water, with the moon hovering above us like our own personal light, was enough to make it all better. I wanted him. I wanted him just as much as he seemed to want me.
“You can’t kiss me like that." He pulled away from my lips, pressing his forehead to mine. He traced a gentle thumb across my bottom lip. “You don’t know what that does to me. It’s not fair, not unless I get to do it all the time.”
“But I want you to kiss me all the time.” My eyes slowly fluttered open, staring right into his deep green ones.
“You could have anyone you want. Anyone.”
“I don’t just want anyone. I promise you that.”
He gave me a sad smile. “You wanna be with a guy who lives in a trailer park?”
“I don’t care about that stuff.” I shook my head at him. “Do you really think I’m like that?”
“Holly, girls like you don’t end up with guys like me. It just doesn’t happen.It’s a nice dream to have. A nice, little fantasy. But I know that as much as I like kissing you, and as much as you live in my head, that you and me… It’s just not gonna happen. I mean, Carter’s the kinda guy your parents would love – even though he never deserved you. I’m not saying you should go back to him. I wouldn’t let you do that. Fuck, I’d kill him before I even let you get near him. But you need a guy who can give you everything you want.”
I frowned. “I thought I showed you that I’m not some shallow person.”
He shrugged, giving me that sad smile again. “I don’t think you’re shallow. Not anymore, at least. But… I don’t know. Don’t you want a big house? Expensive car? Fancy shit I can’t afford? You wanna shack up with good ol’ Trailer Park Trash?”
I grabbed his hand tight at that name. That stupid, offensive name Carter had given him so many years ago. I always hated it. But I hated it even more now.
“Don’t.” I gave him a stern look. “Donotcall yourself that. You are not… Look, I’m not that girl, Sawyer. I don’t need a big house. I don’t need you to spend a million dollars on me. God, I don’t need you tohavea million dollars. You think that stuff makes me happy? That it makes me what, proud? It doesn’t. I’m so thankful to have what I have. My parents… They’ve given me a good life. And maybe I’m a little spoiled…”
“A little?” chuckled Sawyer.
I gave him a playful slap. “My point is that I don’t want or need fancy things. That stuff doesn’t make me happy. That kind of life doesn’t offer automatic happiness. It offers comfort. An easy life. But I don’t just want an easy life. I want so much more than that.” Then I said it. I finally said the words. “And I’m pretty sure I want you.”
Sawyer lifted up a hand, the one that had been on my waist, and rested his fingers on my chin. He guided me closer, moving my face to his. We kissed again. We kissed for the third time in under an hour, but I needed more of him. My hands gripped at the collar of his shirt, pulling him as close as I could get him. Our tongues moved together. Slow but… heavy. The kiss got more and more intense, and soon Sawyer had me whimpering against his lips. He pulled away from me with a hiss.
“Fuck. I can’t get enough of that noise.” He licked at his lips. “Gonna need to hear more of that.”
I blushed, tucking some hair behind my ear. “What does this mean exactly? Because I don’t wanna go home tonight knowing that we can’t do this again.”
“I really, really want you to be mine. I promise I’ll take such good care of you. I can’t buy you a diamond ring or anything. But I swear I’ll spend every day trying to make you smile,” he murmured, his voice low and gravelly, the noise completely drawing me in to him. “You wanna be my girl, princess?”
Biting at my bottom lip, I gave him an eager nod. “More than anything.”
Chapter 39
SAWYER
It had been exactly five days since Holly agreed to be mine. Five days of pure, total, out of my mind bliss. We had kissed eighteen times since that night under the moon. Yes, I was keeping track, because every kiss felt like absolute heaven. How did I get lucky enough to have her? To have her be mine? No one knew shewasmine. Not her parents, not people at school. She was my secret, and I was hers. But I wanted everyone to know.
Well, Summer and Caleb knew. We had bumped into them outside when they were playing, and Summer almost passed out when she saw how long Holly’s hair was. Summer practically dragged Holly back to her place, all giddy and excited. She did Holly’s hair while her brother punched me softly in the stomach, but the braids ended up falling out, so Holly just worked her magic on Summer’s red locks until she created something called a fishtail braid. Lindsey showed up not long later, grinning at me from ear to ear before she insisted I take Holly back to my place.
Now Holly sat across from me in the trailer at the kitchen table, right next to the window. The soft glow of the slow setting sun washed over her. I just stared at her. I was always staring at Holly these days. At her round cheeks and pouty lips – at her little tongue that poked out every now and then; she was so fucking cute. Not to mention her deep, brown eyes that were casted down, and those long lashes that fluttered against her skin whenever she blinked.
“Okay, are you ready for your next question?” She finally looked backup at me, the small card grasped in her hand. “I’ll warn you now. This is a hard one.”
I chuckled at her. She was having fun with this little game of trivia. It was a new way to spend my Friday nights. Brodie – who was thankfully at the skatepark – had brought that box of trivia cards with him from Wichita. We had only played it once since it wasn’t really my thing. But with Holly? With Holly I enjoyed it. I enjoyed how I got to eye her carefully as she sat there under the old lights of my trailer. She was just… there. With me. In my presence. That was enough for her.
“Bring it on, sweetheart,” I said with a grin. “You’ve said that about the last three and I’ve got ‘em all right.”
“Okay, brainiac,” she said, her voice playful. “Who invented the…” She paused for dramatic effect. “Light bulb. Was it Alexander Graham Bell, Thomas Eddison or… Albert Einstein?Really? That’s the option they give? This is an easy one.”
“It was Einstein. Obviously.”
