Page 191 of As They Are
Andwow,the second time was worse.
I looked down at my outfit. Should I have dressed up for the show today? Should I have let them do my makeup?
Should I have given in?
Henry would tell me no. Tammy would too.
I wanted to believe them. I’d spent years fighting back against that very thought. If it were anyone else, I would have told them to fuck off. I was who I was. But this wasn’t just anyone. This was mymom.
For my entire life, there was never a question of changing myself.
And look where that had gotten me. Mom hadleft.What if I had changed? Would she have stayed?
I wanted to say she was wrong, but she wasn’t entirely. She wasn’t wrong about Henry. Ididmess him up. I took him out of his comfort zone time and time again. Since I’d started staying with him, he’d been late to the clinic and kept putting off what he had to do, all because he was talking to me. Today he’d pushed himself past his breaking point.
All because I was throwing him off.
He didn’t say that, but how long did I have until he did?
Tears gathered in my eyes, but I blinked them away. I looked up and saw Tammy walking out with a massive grin on her face.
“Wren!” she said. “I’msohappy to see you.”
At least someone was. “Yeah?”
“I am. Not only did you open the library today, which I need to see, but you’ll never guess who’s here!”
“I have a few guesses,” I said, thinking of Mom.
“Kelsey!”
A young woman appeared at her side. She was Tammy’s height with brown hair and dyed tips and the same blue eyes.
Her daughter? The one she cared about?
Fuck.
“Wow,” I managed to say. “It’s nice to meet you.”
“You too,” Kelsey replied. “I can’t believe I’m back, it’s been too long. I’m even staying with Mom again.”
“Long-term?” I asked.
“I’ll be trying to find a job here.” She slung an arm around Tammy, who leaned into it. “Mom’s thrilled.”
So, Tammy had her daughter back. Her real daughter.
She had no need for me anymore. Why would she? I was a temporary replacement for the real thing.
“That’s so exciting,” I said.
Tammy eyed me. “How did today go? Can I get you a drink, you look?—”
“Actually, I have to get back. There are some final things to film.” I stood and gave them what I hoped was a decent smile. “I’m so happy for you both.”
The second I was out on the sidewalk, I broke out into a run. The crew was packing up, and I caught my break in the garden behind the library.
The irises had finished their bloom a long time ago, but I could remember Henry telling me to find them.
