And then? I have to get to Claire.
And I can’t mess up what I need to say to her.
Chapter 33
Claire
“Welcome to the Beacon Trail clean up! I appreciate everyone who came out to support. If you have any questions, let me know.”
I survey the landscape, the scraggly brush encroaching at every side. We have a group of volunteers and a paid crew, as well, on this fine Saturday morning. They’re all in work gloves and old clothes and wielding various landscaping implements. It’s all-hands-on-deck for this project—my first public thing since I officially started my new job.
None of this is how I thought it would be.
“I’ve got the trash bags,” Sophie says, approaching me with a bunch of black lawn bags tied around her waist like a belt.
“Points for creativity.”
“This way I can clean up and carry the bags.” She whips around to show me her back. “I jimmy rigged it so that it will be easy to tear one off.” She gives the line of bags a tentative tug. “Unless it all falls apart.”
“Thanks, Sophie.” I laugh, but nothing’s reaching me right now. The feelings I predicted I’d have as we start this project are nowhere to be found. They’ve been stolen away by this:How is Benson? Does he miss me, too?
Thankfully, these first couple of days on the job have been so jam-packed that I haven’t had much time to feel his absence.
I’m lying. I do feel his absence—the negative space he left around me.
I manage to assign everyone a job. We have some people carrying their own bags and others with rakes and hoes and an assortment of things to dig up thistles, cut back the growth, and clear out the path. And then, there’s Sophie, who’s hoping to do both.
Without warning, I get a little weepy. I’m so grateful to her and to everyone here. And a nice bonus is Rich is even out of town this weekend. Wahoo!
But I miss Benson. And I don’t know where we stand or who’s supposed to contact whom in this whole scenario. We played phone tag and then…nothing.
We’re in a stand still. What does he want? I know exactly what I want, but I’m trying to be patient until my right path is clear.
I’m here, though. I’m still standing. I’m strong, and if I focus on the work, I can make it through this, right?
And I’ll stop by his place when we’re done—no more waiting around. I can’t stay long, though, because I have a flight to Indianapolis to catch. It’s my first work trip and I’m ridiculously excited to attend a conference for city managers. I’m going to totally geek out over it all.
“I’ll head up the rear,” I say to the trail guide, Al—the same guy who was on that first hike of the season. I lift up my ankle, giving a sheepish smile. It’s a lot better, but I still need to be cautious when taking the trail.
“I’ll go up first then,” Al says with a nod, surveying the land on either side of the trail.
“Thanks for being here,” I say.
“The decline of these trails has been a slippery slope for years.” Al grins with a start. “Pun intended.” He darts a glance in my direction. “Our little band of hikers has tried our best, but cleaning all this up has been outside of our scope.” He adjusts the brim of his hat. “Now, thanks to you, things are heading in a better direction.”
“I can’t take all the credit. The city council approved some extra funds, so that’s made a big difference.”
He smiles wide. I’m not sure what I said to make him smile so much, but hey I’ll take it. But then, he tilts his head to look behind me. “Well, look who’s here.”
Why does he sound so weird? Like, expectant? Surprised?
I swear to you I smell him before I see him.
Notthe president of the hiking club. I smellBenson.That clean musk I adore.
I turn and now I’m the one who’s shocked.
Because it’s not just Benson, he brought his whole family. His whole “Adonis is ugly compared to the Tate brothers” family. I scan the crowd, and it looks like it’s everyone. Even Thomas and Celine.