Page 45 of Forgive Not Forget
“You all right?” Anna asked, taking a seat beside her and rubbing her leg.
“Yes. No,” Katherine changed her mind. Why she always felt the need to respond with a yes to that question she’d never know. It was okay to share. “I just feel there’s no time to breathe. Every day brings some new hurdle I have to climb over. It’s relentless. Everything is just on top of me, squeezing the life out of me.”
She held back the tears she could feel forming in her eyes. She’d cried enough in the last twenty-four hours; she didn’t have the strength for more. If crying was supposed to make you feel better, then why was it so exhausting?
“I think I underestimated how much responsibility the abbey would be. And not just the abbey — the staff, the weight of customer satisfaction that needs to be constantly met.”
Anna’s head popped up. “You’re not thinking of giving up, are you? I know you’ll get your license back in a few months, but I think we make a good team.”
Katherine sensed a slight panic in Anna’s voice. “Who knows what the future holds.” It wasn’t exactly reassuring, but it was the truth.
“I’m not sure this is the time to start getting philosophical,” Anna said. “Things will improve; the build will be completed; the archaeologists will come and go. Becks will speak to you again.”
Katherine started to speak, rethought her phrasing, then realised there was no kind way to say it. She tried to keep her tone gentle as she pointed out, “Harry won’t improve.”
“No.” Anna pulled in her bottom lip and chewed on it. “He was never going to, was he?”
“No, he wasn’t. This new diagnosis may lead to a swifter progression of his Parkinson’s.”
“You’re sure you want to tell him tomorrow?” Anna asked. “We can just leave it to his GP to tell him on Monday if you can’t face it?”
“It’s best coming from us; we both know that. I’ll be fine. I’ve given enough unwelcome news over the years.”
“Not to people who are a father figure to you.”
“We owe it to him to tell him.” Katherine tapped Anna’s hand, which was still on her thigh. “Why do I suddenly feel the need for a peppermint tea?”
“It’s the window ledge,” Anna said, leaning back as she did. “I always crave it when I sit here. You brought it to me here the fourth time we met.”
“Fourth time? Who was counting?” The fact that it had meant so much to Anna at the time caused an unprompted smile to cross Katherine’s lips.
“Just me apparently.” Anna nudged her. “Shall we go to bed?”
“Yes, I’m knackered.”
Although she had gone to bed early after her disagreement with Rebecca, she hadn’t slept well. Helena had entered her dreams for the first time in a while, and so she wasn’t keen on sleeping tonight. She had brought her book and a sturdy reading light to their camping tent to keep her awake. Hopefully, she could summon visions of Carol Aird fromThe Price of Salt, instead of Helena from beyond the grave.
They made their way back to their tent in cooler air now that the sun had fully set. Rather than changing into pyjamas, they pulled on some jogging bottoms and sweatshirts. A quick brush of their teeth with a bottle of water to rinse, and they buried themselves under the duvet, finding each other’s bodies for warmth.
“So, you had sex in a tent?” Katherine had to know.
“Yes. It was whilst I was on the Duke of Edinburgh’s Award expedition.”
“I’m not sure sex counts towards the physical activity section for D of E — or as a skill, come to think of it.”
“Nor was pregnancy,” Anna said with a wicked grin, “but the daughter of our religious education teacher managed it whilst we were camping in Snowdonia.”
“Oof, how embarrassing.”
“Can I persuade you to partake in a little physical activity now?” Anna asked. “It’s guaranteed to warm us up.”
Katherine hesitated. “Do you mind if we don’t tonight? My head is buzzing too much with everything.”
“Of course not.”
“Surely we should be on watch or something, anyway?” Katherine questioned.
“I think we’re close enough to hear anything going on in the same place.”
