Page 89 of Forgive Not Forget
They made their way across the abbey site to a bench which was perfect for watching the sun set behind the abbey.
“The gardeners did a remarkable job filling that bomb hole,” Anna said. “It will be nice when Sophie has filled in all her trenches too. Just think, by next weekend we could have normality restored at the abbey.”
Katherine collapsed onto the bench beside her. “That is a time I look forward to.”
A scratching noise drew their attention to the nearest trench. They furrowed their eyebrows at each other and then glanced back to the trench to see Virginia jump out.
“Virginia, have you been using that as a litter tray? What a surprise for Sophie on Monday.” Katherine chuckled.
Virginia approached them, rubbing herself against both their legs before disappearing under the bench.
Anna shook her head. “You’d never catch a dog doing that.”
“No, they don’t even try to bury it.”
Anna nudged herself into Katherine, and they fell into silence. The abbey was such a peaceful spot to while away time. She didn’t believe there was anywhere in the world she felt happier, especially with her gorgeous fiancée sitting next to her. Assuming Katherine still had that intention.
“Katherine…”
She turned to face her. Anna sensed she already knew what she was about to ask.
“You want to know what happened at the prison?”
Anna nodded. “Only if you’re ready to talk about it.”
“I am.”
Anna took her hand and listened as Katherine described her initial impression of the prison. The depressing shadows the high walls cast over the courtyard. The smell: a combination of the disinfectant of a hospital ward and the sweat from a gymnasium. The bare walls. The feeling of claustrophobia despite knowing she could leave at any time. How she’d only just held herself together as Jeremy had entered. Helena’s last word.
Anna felt tears forming in her eyes. How had Katherine got through it? How was she holding herself together as she recounted it now?
“It felt like, for the first time, I was given a voice. A chance to be heard. Answers I’ve always needed.” Katherine looked down at their joined hands. “I gave him my forgiveness and Helena’s; it’s what she would have wanted. She could never bear a grudge.”
“I’m sure that’s more than he deserved.”
“It was,” Katherine quickly agreed, looking up. “Yet it was important for me to give. I didn’t go in there with any intention of giving it, but I could see that giving it would force me to accept what had happened. Once it was accepted, I realised there was no changing the outcome.”
“I get that.”
“That man deprived me of one future. I’m sure as hell not going to let him deprive me of another.” Katherine turned to Anna. “I would like to have children with you but on one condition.”
“We adopt?” Anna interrupted her with a hopeful smile.
“Yes.” Katherine’s face softened with relief. “Are you sure you’re okay with that?”
“Of course. I know how difficult it would be for you to watch a pregnancy evolve and not compare it to the past. We’re looking to the future from now on, yeah?”
Katherine nodded.
“So we’ll do things differently,” Anna continued. “Hopefully, this way we can help some kids who need it. There is a point I’d like to raise, though.”
“Go on.”
“I sense that a weight, albeit small, has been lifted since the visit, but I think you have PTSD. I’m going to insist you get therapy.” It was something that had bugged her since she’d first become acquainted with Katherine. The woman had experienced the worst trauma imaginable yet had received no professional emotional support in dealing with it. If any blame was to be laid for it, it was to be laid at Rebecca’s door. Not that Anna had the intention of airing that fact.
“Okay,” Katherine replied softly.
“No arguments?”
