Page 67 of Suffer No Fools
"You heard me?"
"I," ..."Is this real?"
Tovey sighed as he shifted closer, pressing their foreheads together."It's as real as the strange dream I was having, and now I know I'm awake."
"What did you dream?"Stan stuck to a safer topic than their feelings.
"I was back on the ship, the night you left for the pleasure house. Except ... you paid them to lie to me. You paid for two pleasure workers to be healed."Tovey kissed his cheek."Tell me the truth."
"That is the truth,"Stan whispered.
"What were you thinking? The same thoughts you had earlier, that you're not good enough for me? That I would leave you eventually, so you might as well give me a good reason before I pick away at you with silly ones?"
"Is that really so hard to believe?"Stan asked."You're the sun, and I'm just an island you travel over each day. Sometimes you warm me with your kindness, and sometimes you burn me with your words. Sometimes, you disappear behind the clouds, and I can't reach you for days."
Tovey tucked his head against Stan's chest with a whimper."Gods, you're more than an island. You're the whole fucking world."He sniffled."You're my whole fucking world."
"Maybe before Hugo, but not anymore."
Tovey jerked his head up, almost smashing Stan's nose. Stan had never seen that expression of horror and betrayal on Tovey's face before, and he hated it. He wanted to kiss it and make it better, but there was no taking back the lies he'd told.
"I'm still yours,"Stan said,"same as I was then. You stayed to torment me. I'd expected you to find someone else instead."
"I liked tormenting you,"Tovey admitted."I wouldn't have, if I'd known ... gods, Stan. You made me hate you for nothing."
"Shut up and tell each other you love each other already."Hugo cuddled up against Stan's back and draped his arm over both him and Tovey, pulling them tighter together.
"Is the youngster trying to lecture us on love?"Stan knew from the way Hugo snorted and Tovey's breath caught in his throat that they'd both heard him.
Tovey leaned forward and kissed Stan, slow and sweet, with none of his usual aggression. This kiss meant more. A new beginning.
"I can't say it," Tovey said. "It's ... you let me believe a lie for fifteen years!"
"I'm sorry," Stan whispered.
"I can say I'm starting over, with you."
Stan nodded. "I'd like that."
"Good," Hugo mumbled. "Now go to sleep." He snuggled even closer to Stan and rested his head on top of Stan's. Stan saw a flash of his pink tongue in the corner of his eye.
"Now, that was uncalled for!" Tovey rose on one elbow. "Hold him down while I tickle him."
"No! No tickles! Sleep!"
Stan laughed and wrapped Tovey in a hug. Tovey still managed to get one of his hands free to tickle Hugo, but he stopped the instant Stan pressed their lips together.
"Gods," Tovey said against his lips. "I could murder you in your sleep."
"But you won't."
Tovey snuggled against Stan's chest, moving his soft lips out of range for more kisses. After a few moments, his snores echoed Hugo's. Stan drifted off to the happiest sounds he'd ever heard.
#
Tovey
Tovey woke with a start. Something was wrong. Very wrong. He heard Hugo's panicked voice inside his head.
