Page 59 of Never Tamed
Mathis growls, a low warning sound under his breath. His dark eyes go black. “You might be able to bullshit the rest of the world but I know you too well.” He taps the side of his temple. “I fucking feel you in the worst place. You’re an itch in my goddamn head.”
I lift my chin. “I’m not going to apologize for it.”
We share the same mate. There is no going back now. I tried to ignore the bond and it only hurt Ren. Now, to break it is impossible, and Mathis and I will have to come to some sort of accord. Spoken or otherwise.
“Go to her and you beg on your knees like a fucking pup.” He walks his fingers through the air to the door. “It might not make a difference but you have to try.”
Then Mathis strides to the door, turning his back on me. But his anguish is there in my mind, the thin control he clings to like a life preserver in a stormy sea, and if I give in, I’ll be lost too.
“Do you think it will help your mood swings if I do?” I ask with a sneer.
He flashes me the middle finger in lieu of an answer but I can’t breathe easily even when he disappears outside.Meeting adjourned.
He’s right.
Getting down on my knees to grovel will only be part of the process of forgiveness and Ren is well within her rights to send me packing. But she can demand I lick her feet like a dog and I’ll do it.
I tap my fingers on my thigh and follow Mathis out the door. Maybe there’s nothing I can do about Andras right now. Our hands are tied. But I know I can start to fix things with Ren.
No one stops me, no one looks my way, not when I grab several of the slender chains off the barred doors of the old camp buildings. The ones not in use. There are piles of similar chains strewn from the cabins we’ve opened and made our own.
I need…
Something. Right now, there are no fancy jewelry stores available. I can’t show my face in the city without bringing the heat down on us. So what do you do when there’s nothing to buy to give your mate?
Normally I’d send piles of jewelry and roses and notes I barely put any effort into. Money did the speaking for me.
Money won’t work for Ren.
My hands aren’t used to moving like this anymore. Were they ever? I’m not the kind of man who fucking makes crafts like a kid and presents them to proud parents. One withering glance from my father and any kind of creative ability I used to have shriveled up and died.
I pry the wedding band off my finger, shoving it past swollen knuckles and swallowing down a bit of pain, stomping a path toward the main lodge.
The pieces of the mangled metal are easily torn apart and manipulated. Several bright chinks loop into a necklace with the band at the front like some kind of ridiculous One Ring to Rule Them All bullshit.
Step one.
The acid in my throat sinks deeper, scalding all the way through me.
Torin. You want to tell me what you’re doing?
Noble’s voice sounds in my head and I stop mid-stride, knocking into one of Mathis’s wolves. The man bares his teeth at me before ducking his head, admonished, and hurrying away from whatever thunderous expression he sees on my face.
None of your fucking business, I throw back.
Noble chuckles.Testy, are we?You’ll get used to this. But fine. I’ll leave you alone. A pause, and then,She’s down by the edge of the lake. When you’re ready.She said she needed some space after being fuckedso good.
I ignore that last part. I’m not ready yet.
I’m not sure if I'll ever feel ready and confident and like myself. The old me, the person I used to be, has been fucking erased. Wiped off the map. The person I could be now hasn’t fully formed yet.
My mouth dries and I grind my jaw, working it back and forth despite the ache.
From the angle of the sun, the moon will rise within a few hours. It isn’t time for dinner yet.
Dinner, fuck. I haven’t cooked a meal on my own in my entire life.
So why would cooking for Ren be a good idea?
