Page 151 of Rhythm Of Our Souls
“The money. The fame. Is it worth it?” she asks seriously. “The biggest reason why I keep myself hidden from the world is because I know how evil it can be. I could never live the life you have. And I’m in awe of how you’ve handled everything so far. But now, at this point in your life, after everything you've been through. Is it worth it?”
“I... I don’t know,” I admit.
“Have you thought about taking a break?” she asks. “From all of it, just a few years, while you enjoy your new pack. Maybe live without the pressure of the popstar life and just enjoy it for once.”
“I have,” I answer, looking away. “More than I’m proud to admit.”
“It’s okay.” She takes my hand. “It's okay to admit it’s too much. For not wanting this life anymore.”
“But is it?” I ask, tears filling my eyes. “I have everything anyone could ever want, and here I am acting like a spoiled brat.”
“You are not,” she replies sternly. “You are only human. And your mental health matters most. You can’t keep going like this if it’s going to eat away at you.”
“Yeah,” I sigh, laying my head against her shoulder. “I know.”
The fact of the matter is that I don’t want to be in the spotlight right now. I don’t want to be followed. I don’t want strangers having access to me. And I shouldn’t need to have a team of guards following me around to make sure I’m safe.
At first, this career was the ultimate dream. And it was amazing until... it wasn’t. After I met Nate, things got so much better. And for a while, I thought I was okay. That this life would be fine.
Then Lulu, Brady, and Gavin came into my life and showed me that there’s more to it than working myself to the bone.
I love singing, it will always be a part of me.
But people grow and things change.
I’vechanged.
And now I have a lot to think about.
Whispering has me blinking my eyes open. It takes a second to see that I’m not in my room. Looking over, I see Maya with a baby on her chest.
“Shit,” I groan, moving to sit up. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep.”
“It’s okay,” she laughs. “You needed it.”
“Hey,” Lulu’s voice has my eyes snapping over to see her sitting next to Maya on the bed.
“Lulu?” I blink a few times before my eyes fill with tears.
She gives me a watery smile. “I was worried when I came to see you this morning and you weren't in your bed. Then the nurse surprised me by telling me you were here with Maya,” she laughs, wiping at her eyes. “She had her baby,” Lulu says in awe, staring down at the little human in Maya’s arms.
I get a good look at the sweet girl. She’s so innocent and pure. The real world has not yet left its mark on her.
I want that someday. A family. But the idea of them growing up in the world I live in scares me.
“She’s beautiful.” I smile down at the baby for a moment before getting out of bed.
“Where are you going?” Lulu rushes over to me.
“I’ll be right back. There’s something I need to do.”
“What?” Her brows furrow. “Right now?”
“Do you trust me?” I ask, cupping her face.
“Yes. Of course.”
“I’m so fucking sorry for everything I put you through,” I apologize, pulling her into my arms.
