“It’s no different for me.”
“I thought you said he wasn’t your boyfriend.”
“He’s not. I’m making a point.”
An almost pout formed on Krista’s lips. She wasn’t putting on too blatant a show, but obviously she wasn’t ready to accept the argument Iris was giving her. That was fine. Iris could be content to let the seeds she’d planted sprout over time.
But any more time right now and she would be late to the library.
“Now,” she said firmly, “I have to get ready for work. Why don’t you head out, stop to get some coffee or something on your way to the office? You’ve got time.”
Reluctance obvious on her face, Krista finally agreed to go, allowing Iris to breathe a sigh of relief. The interruption to her morning had her scrambling to get ready and reach the library before eight, but hopefully Krista would think about what had been said and this problem would finally start to dissipate.
Hopefully. But Iris had the feeling that hope was misplaced.
Thirteen
Summer continued to pass in heated waves. Iris saw Jamie occasionally, when she happened to be meeting up with her friends for girls’ night or when she stopped by Wildwood Brew for a coffee, though she didn’t get the sense that he was stalking her. They talked, texted, but he didn’t do more than give her a quick kiss or a casual lingering hand on her arm. Iris couldn’t decide if she was relieved or disappointed.
Scarlett returned to Scotland with Gavin to work on her next book, leaving a hole that FaceTime just couldn’t fill, but Iris knew her friend was happy, and that was all she could ask for, really. Though she missed her best friend, this dual life was a permanent situation, and Iris had vowed to get as used to it as she could, even if it left her feeling lonely at times. Lily and Claire and Erin welcomed her as an equal in their little group, but it wasn’t the same as having Scarlett there. Still, Iris made the best of it.
She didn’t speak of their morning argument with Krista again. The strained stalemate made visits awkward, but Iris was determined to give her daughter time to chew on the truths Iris had shared with her. And Iris was chewing on her own truths, like how much she enjoyed seeing Jamie each time they ran into each other. She didn't want to accept it, didn't want to be focused on one particular person, but even as she shared a random dance with another man at the pub on girls’ night, she found herself constantly searching the crowd for a glimpse of his forest-green eyes.
One hot August evening, Iris timed herself out on the library’s office computer with a sigh of relief. Thanks to a relatively quiet day, she’d been able to spend extra time in the back office, unpacking and cataloging the new arrivals. Her favorite part of the job. Glancing around, she felt satisfaction at the cleared space surrounding her. There would be more arrivals tomorrow, but for now she was all caught up.
Stretching her stiff muscles, she realized suddenly that she felt accomplished but not exhausted. For so many months now, the complications of her life, the changes had worn her down, dragged her into fatigue so that even the simplest task, the ones she enjoyed the most, were overshadowed by a depletion of energy she couldn’t pull herself out of. Now, though, she felt almost like her old self. Like she’d found calm in her life. The emotional upheaval of the divorce no longer dominated her days and confused her nights. She felt…good, and she hadn’t felt just plain good in a long, long time.
She liked it.
After retrieving her purse from the bottom desk drawer, she pushed in her chair and walked out to the check-out desk. Ashley sat at the front computer, casually flipping through a magazine as she waited for patrons to approach. “All set for the night?” Iris asked her.
The young woman gave Iris her usual bright smile. “All set!”
“Good.” She settled her purse strap on her shoulder. “I’ll see you tomorrow then.”
“Have a good night,” Ashley said.
Iris had almost made it to the front glass doors when one side opened and Jamie walked through. Dressed in a white button-down—with the sleeves rolled up those powerful forearms—and classic black slacks, he made her breath hitch in her throat. The rumpled state of his dress shirt and the tousled look of his hair, the red nearly overshadowed with salt-and-pepper, told her he’d been at the restaurant. He looked tired but, like her, satisfied with a hard day’s work, and the way a smile lit up his face when he caught sight of her reflected her own jolt of pleasure as he entered the room.
“Jamie.”
“Hey there, beautiful.” Jamie beelined for her and brushed a casual kiss along her cheek, his usual greeting. She’d seen him greet Erin the same way, but she had a sneaking suspicion that the very attached and very pregnant Erin did not react the same way Iris did to that kiss. Everything inside her melted at the touch of his lips to her skin, and heat centered in her core in a way she was struggling more and more to ignore.
“What are you doing here tonight? Don’t you have the dinner shift?” He typically did unless it was his night off, which seemed to be most often on Thursdays. She knew Michael took the night shift at the farm.
Jamie turned to face the doors, walking alongside her as she made her way out into the hot summer night. “Had to switch shifts with my assistant manager so he could have the day off for an appointment.” His arm slid around her waist as naturally as breathing, his warmth enjoyable despite the sweat-inducing temperatures outside. “So I thought I’d drop by and see my favorite girl.”
She smiled. “I thought Baby was your favorite girl.”
There was that wicked grin. “She used to be.”
He said things like that more and more. Iris tended to brush them off as casual flirting, but tonight she couldn’t deny the ache in her chest that told her she wished it were true. She shouldn’t—it was too dangerous to risk her heart with this man, or any man, for that matter—but she could no longer deny that the desire was there nonetheless.
Jamie paused on the sidewalk and drew her to a stop along with him. “Hey, what’s that frown for?”
She stared into his eyes, intent on seeing…well, she wasn’t sure, but she knew she was looking for something. “Why do you keep coming around to see me, Jamie?”
She was startled at the deep laugh that rumbled from his chest. “Only you would ask me that, Iris.”