Page 15 of His to Possess
“Which you didn’t read!” he shouts, eyes blazing. I can’t help but jump back slightly at the barely controlled anger I can feel radiating off him. “You didn’t even know you’d be required to do this asinine thing in public.”
My stomach sinks even lower, and I find I can’t look him in the eye. He’s right—not reading the entire contract had been majorly stupid. “I assumed if there was anything I needed to know, my friend would have told me. She did mention that the, uh, sex would take place at the club.” I shake my head, shame curling deep inside me. “I thought that was a good thing. I thought it meant I wouldn’t have to leave the premises with a strange man.”
“But you had no problem opening your legs for a strange man.”
Anger rises up to mix with the shame. “You don’t get to stand there and judge me, Philip. Do I need to remind you that you were there too? I went to that club tonight out of necessity. You went to bid on a woman’s virginity.”
He takes a step closer, anger swirling dark in his eyes. “I was at that club to meet a business associate. I only went into the auction room because I saw you. I would neverchooseto participate in something like that.”
“But you have no problem patronizing the establishment that runs the whole thing, do you? You could have insisted on meeting somewhere else but you had zero qualms about spending money in that club. And we both know it’s not the only place like that where you hang out. You think I haven’t heard the rumors about Club Wyld? I know exactly what men like you do there, Philip. I’m not a child.”
He takes another step closer and it’s everything I can do not to shrink back in fear. He looks so big, towering over me in his kitchen. So big and incredibly fierce. Maybe he’s not a man I should be baiting like this.
“You don’t know anything about my club,” he growls. “And you don’t know anything about what men like me do there.”
My throat goes dry. He’s obviously trying to intimidate me. His words are every bit as dark and threatening as his flashing eyes. So why do I feel desire seeping in at the edges of my fear? I should be shrinking away from him, but everything in me is calling out for me to lean closer. To see if I can get him to tell me exactly what men like him do at Club Wyld.
I watch as his gaze flicks downward, landing on my lips. His eyes seem to darken even more before they continue their path lower. I realize belatedly that my breaths have become rapid and shallow with his nearness, my chest practically heaving. That’s what he’s looking at right now—the rise and fall of my chest. Perhaps he’s noticing the way my breasts are straining at the fabric of my dress. Or how tight my nipples are growing by the second. His eyes dart back up to my face and I see nothing but desire there.
Holy shit. Does Philip Matthewswant me?
No sooner has that question formed in my mind, Philip jerks himself backwards, looking almost unsteady on his feet. I don’t think I’ve ever seen this man look unsteady in my life. He runs a hand through his hair, cursing softly under his breath. “Go to bed, Lilah.”
There’s a hollowness growing in my center, a deep emptiness begging to be filled. In spite of everything that’s happened tonight, in spite of all my fears and all the shame, I want him. It seems insane that I could be thinking about sex at all after the way those men belittled and degraded me tonight. I should want to run far away from anyone with a dick right now. But I don’t want to run away from Philip. I want to runtohim. I want him to take me in his arms and make me forget every fear with his kisses. I want to feel his hands on me. I want him to fill the emptiness that continues to throb within me.
“Lilah.” His voice is sharp, angry. He sounds like he’s barely keeping himself from exploding. That should frighten me, but I find myself wondering just what would happen if he actually lost control.
“We’re done here,” he says, turning away from me. “I’ll show you to the guest room. We can figure out what the hell we’re going to do tomorrow.”
That sensation of being plunged into cold water hits me again. Because what could possibly be different in the morning? A good night’s sleep isn’t going to change the fact that I’m desperate for this money. And I doubt it’s going to change the fact that whatever moment I might have just imagined in his kitchen, Philip still has no plan to take my virginity in front of the members of Club Rendezvous.
Maybe the best thing for both of us would be for me to leave first thing in the morning and go back to let the three club owners know I want to be re-entered in the auction. I’m sure there’s not another man who would be willing to shell out a million for my company, but the other girls had all brought in at least twenty thousand dollars. That wouldn’t solve all my problems, but it would buy me some time.
I wordlessly follow Philip down the hall to the guest room, my brain swimming with plans. I have no idea how often the auction is held, but from the way the men were talking tonight, the insane bidding for me caused quite a bit of interest. Maybe they’d be willing to let me try again right away. Or at least next weekend. Time is getting tight, but I could manage until next weekend without the money if I have to.
“Here you go,” Philip says when we reach the room, not meeting my eyes. This isn’t the room Veronica and I crashed in the last time we were here, but I can barely take in the space around me, so full is my brain with plans and worries. I’m sure it’s every bit as luxurious and nice as the rest of the penthouse. It’s just hard for me to care right now.
Philip’s penthouse is as perfect as a fantasy, but that’s all it is. I might sleep in luxury for the night but the real world will be waiting for me in the morning. And there’s nothing anyone—even a man as rich and powerful as Philip Matthews —can do to stop it.
Philip
Iwait in Lilah’s room while she gets ready for bed in the bathroom. I found her an old pair of sweats and a T-shirt that will be massively big on her, but it’s better than the idea of her sleeping in here naked. It’s already going to be hard enough for me to get to sleep without that image in my head.
She emerges a moment later and I realize I didn’t do myself any favors. She looks so fucking cute in my oversized clothes that I just want to wrap her up in my arms and carry her back to my room. Which is insane, seeing as how I never have women in my room. So why can I see Lilah there so clearly?
“Philip?” she asks, fidgeting with the edge of my t-shirt. I realize that I’ve been staring at her since she left the bathroom and give myself a mental shake. I need to figure out a way to start thinking about this girl as my sister’s friend again, or else this whole thing will end in disaster.
I stand quickly and walk to the bedroom door. “Looks like you’re all set,” I say, careful not to look at her. “I’ll be right down the hall if you need anything.”
“Oh.” She sounds surprised by my sudden departure. And maybe a little disappointed? “Philip,” she calls, before I can ponder that too much. I close my eyes, trying to muster up all my strength before I face her again. It still hits me like a punch to the gut when I turn and see her standing there by the side of the bed, looking more than a little lost. Her hair is wild around her shoulders, far from the careful updo she’d worn at the beginning of the night. She washed the layers of makeup off and she looks younger with her skin bare. She also looks even more beautiful, pure in a way I don’t think I’ve ever seen on a woman. I know it’s not just a sexual purity I’m noticing in her—she isn’t innocent because she’s a virgin. She’s innocent because she has a sweet, loving, pure heart.
And I am definitely not the man who’s going to protect it. Because if there’s anything I’m not, it’s pure or innocent. I’m a selfish, egotistical, conceited bastard who gets off on tying up women and spanking them before fucking them. Lilah would be a fool to trust me with her heart or her body.
But I’m determined that she can trust me with her safety, and that needs to be my focus for the next week. Something has this girl terrified enough to put herself at great risk, and I’m determined to figure out what.
“Yes?” I prompt her.
She gives me a shy smile. “Thank you. For…well, for everything.”
