“All right,” she repeated. “Tell me what is on your mind, Father.”
The viscount nodded, seeming relieved by her reaction. He gave her another warm smile, patting her hands, which were folded tightly in her lap.
“I am aware that you have said that you have come to terms with being a spinster,” he said. “However, you have never met an old spinster yourself. I have at various functions and dinners. And I know that many of them come to regret it in time. And one of my biggest fears is that you, too, would come to regret spinsterhood, especially now that Isabel has found happiness with Patrick. So you see, I truly have done this with your best interests in heart.”
Martha nodded along as her father spoke, but she wanted to tell her father why she was reluctant to have anything to do with Lord Billington all the while, more than she had even moments earlier. She looked down at her hands, trying to choose her words carefully.
“I understand, Father,” she said. “It is a gamble, being a spinster. But it is also a gamble, marrying a stranger.”
Her father nodded, squeezing her hand.
“I know it’s a gamble, darling,” he said. “But one thing that will never be questioned is whether you will be taken care of for the rest of your life, long after I am gone. I believe in your kindness and compassion, Martha. And your talent, as well. I believe that, with time, you and Lord Billington can grow to love each other.”
Martha offered another timid smile, but she had to look away. She had never wanted to learn how to love the man she married. She had always wanted to marry the man she loved. The very idea that she would have to do those things in reverse order made Martha want to lock herself in her chambers until she was too old to be anything but a spinster. But her father truly did mean well, and it was clearly important to him that he knew she would be cared for. Even though he was pushing her toward taking a step that she would have never chosen, she couldn’t be angry with him.
She looked back up at the viscount, disheartened to see that his expression was falling. No doubt, he was sensing her increasing reluctance, and feeling bad for upsetting her. She gave him a bright smile, opening her arms and embracing her father.
“Only time will tell,” she said, trying to not think about how disappointing those words were. “I am grateful for everything you have done for me, Papa.”
The viscount smiled widely again then, kissing his daughter on both cheeks.
“It is my pleasure, my dear,” he said, rising and taking her hands to help her do the same. “I would do anything for my darling daughter.”
Martha nodded once more, kissing his cheeks before excusing herself. But as she left the room, her hopes and smile fell. Her father truly believed he was doing a good thing, which meant he wouldn’t be talked out of the arrangement. Not without some major, mind-changing event happening between then and the day of the wedding. She wondered if she could dare to hope that such a thing would happen.
She didn’t quite have time to do any painting between the time she left her father’s study and the time that Lord Billington was expected to arrive. So, she sat in her chambers, trying to make some new sketches for paintings. She tried, and she managed to sketch the horizon over a forest. But she knew, even before she finished it that she wouldn’t paint it. It wasn’t as good as she knew it would be, and it was rather bland and overdone. It had helped her pass the time, however. Before she knew it, Lily came to help her dress for the museum.
A few hours after speaking with her father, she met Isabel and her mother in the drawing room, wearing a light purple colored dress with silver ribbons and lace, and a bonnet embroidered with pearls,an absolute match to her gloves. The women gushed over her, and it was all she could do to not push them off her and chastise them. She knew that they wanted her to find happiness. But she couldn’t get them to understand that she would never find it with Lord Billington.
“You must be at least a little excited,” Isabel asked after Martha quietly nodded to her fifth question and remark in a row.
Martha shrugged. She might not want to bring down anyone else’s mood, but she couldn’t bring herself to lie, either.
“I’m sure the exhibit will be wonderful,” she said truthfully.
The viscountess and Isabel exchanged a knowing look.
“Darling, try to give Lord Billington a chance,” her mother said.
Martha nodded, growing impatient with her family.
“I will,” she said.… give him the chance to put an end to this marriage arrangement,she added silently.
“He really seemed interested in your paintings,” Isabel offered.
Martha was preparing to tell Isabel that she didn’t care what he was interested in, because it wasn’t her as a lady, when the butler announced the viscount’s arrival. She shot her mother and sister a look as she rose, indicating for the butler to show him in. And when Lord Billington did walk in, her heart skipped.
He looked incredibly handsome in his blue suit, with dark blue boots and white gloves. He wore no hat; opting instead to have his hair combed back, and his blue eyes were sparkling, much to her surprise. She could deny their compatibility all she liked. The one thing she couldn’t deny, or debate, was his handsomeness. She had been set on making him want to end the marriage arrangement before he arrived. But now that she was looking at him, she wondered if she could do it.
Chapter Fourteen
Albert locked eyes with Miss Elwood as the butler took his leave. He was instantly mesmerized by her jade green eyes. It took him a moment to realize that she was staring at him intensely. He had no doubt that she was disgusted by his appearance. Though he had to commend her for holding his gaze for as long as she did, despite her distaste for his scars. No other person, apart from his mother and father, had ever looked him in the eyes for as long as she always did. He found that odd, but there was no other reason why she would stare at him like she was.
Miss Elwood, on the other hand, was a vision. She wore a lavender colored evening gown with a gently pleated, A-line skirt, and a silver ribbon around the waist. The gloves matched the dress, but they appeared to shimmer a pale purplish-silver when the light hit them just right. Her bonnet matched her gloves and was adorned with pearls. And from beneath the bonnet, several wavy strands of her light brown hair peeked out, resting against her cheeks and the back of her pale neck.
Her heart-shaped lips were red, but not from cosmetics. Albert guessed she had been biting them, giving them extra color. She was very lovely, Albert realized. And he couldn’t help feeling awkward about his own marred appearance, next to her beauty. Despite his discomfort about his own appearance, he couldn’t help being in awe of hers. He just prayed that he wouldn’t bring too much embarrassment to her while they were out among the ton.
There was a ruffle of skirts nearby, and Albert realized that he had done nothing since entering Elwood Manor except for staring at his future bride. He tried to keep himself from blushing as her mother and cousin curtseyed. He cursed himself furiously as he bowed, fighting to compose himself. Miss Elwood might be, by all accounts, his bride-to-be. But he still had no business staring at her in such a scandalous fashion. What would her family think of such behavior? If he wasn’t careful, he’d be forced to marry her for being lewd and inappropriate.
