Page 38 of An Arranged Betrothal with a Contrite Duke
Lydia smiled at him again, spinning around as she held her hands out wide.
“I could have never imagined that such a place could be the school of which I have dreamt for so long,” she said.
“I asked the servants to see to the restoration of this building. But even though that was so recent, the difference is already astounding.”
Lydia smiled again, melting Michael’s heart.
“I didn’t expect such progress so quickly, either,” she said. “But it is wonderful, and I cannot thank you enough.”
Michael nodded, wrestling with his guilt. He was determined not to ruin his wife’s excitement. But he also knew that he wouldn’t have cared so much if he hadn’t lied to her. Which, as much as he hated to admit it, he had done from the beginning of their marriage. The very foundation of their future together was dishonest. And with each passing day, the mire in which he found himself sinking got deeper and deeper.
Michael knew that Lydia was getting suspicious. It was clear that she knew something was wrong with the fact that he never came to visit her in her chambers at night. He worried that seeing him so earnestly invested in their project might make her believe that perhaps things could change between them. That made him feel even worse. The last thing he could ever do was to allow her to grow close to him. But he couldn’t keep her at arm’s length when he was trying so hard to keep her suspicion from increasing.
As they entered the next hall, the four of them began discussing their plans for the school. Miss Bryony, seemingly the meticulous planner, started listing out the supplies they would need for the classrooms.
“We'll need desks, chairs, blackboards, chalk, and, of course, an assortment of books for the children to read and learn from,” she said, ticking off each item on her fingers.
Lydia nodded in agreement and then gasped, as if she recalled something important.
“Oh,” she said, bouncing a little in her excitement. “I just remembered, there are some supplies left in the closet of the old schoolroom at Tockenham Castle. I could visit and bring them here; it would save us some trouble and expense.”
Michael looked impressed with Lydia's resourcefulness and offered his help.
“That is an excellent idea, my dear,” he said. “I can accompany you to the castle and assist you in gathering the supplies.” He regretted the question as soon as he asked it. Taking a trip to her family’s home would remind him of what he had done with the vase. It would also give her the impression that he wanted to get closer with her family than he already had. But she shook her head, giving his arm a gentle pat.
"Thank you, Michael,” she said. “Your support means a great deal to me. But I will see to the supplies myself. I know how busy work keeps you, and you are already doing a great deal for this school. I can handle fetching the supplies. And I will do so at my earliest convenience.”
Michael nodded, praying that his relief wasn’t too apparent.
“Very well,” he said. “Feel free to go any time you wish. And do let me know if there is something you don’t have there that you need.”
The other women murmured again with the same approval they had had each time Michael spoke to his wife. Clearly, they continued to be impressed with him. And more clearly still, Lydia was soaring amongst the clouds. Michael wished he could take comfort in those facts. But his guilt would remain a dark cloud hanging over his head.
While they continued wandering through the old hall, Lydia caught Michael's gaze, and their eyes locked for a moment. In that instant, he felt a spark of something powerful and knew, deep down, that their connection was growing stronger with each passing day. He wanted nothing more than to hang on to that feeling and help the feeling to grow. He would swallow his guilt, if only for the moment. He refused to allow any weirdness from him to ruin what was clearly such a wonderful day for his wife.
Chapter Twenty-one
“Oh, Michael,” Lydia gushed for the tenth time since they entered the old hall. “I just cannot believe how perfect this building is.”
Michael grinned at his wife, adoring the brilliant smile on her face. It was the only reprieve he got from the burdening guilt he felt at the way he had been treating Lydia.
“I am glad that you like it,” he said, also for the tenth time. “Since you approve, I shall dispatch a group of maids to get it in tip-top shape whenever you are ready to begin using it.”
Lady Mary smiled at him, looking at him with awe.
“It is so wonderful to see you supporting Lydia’s dream,” she said.
Michael shrugged, his cheeks growing hot.
“She is my wife,” he said. “If it pleases her, and it is within my power, I see no reason not to grant it to her.”
Miss Brinton looked at him with a cool smile. She was pleasant enough. But she was clearly the second most clever of the women. Second, of course, to Lydia.
“Most husbands would very much object to this idea,” she said. “I dare say that Lydia is very fortunate to have your support.”
Michael blushed again. He knew that he was far from the perfect husband. But he did genuinely support Lydia’s vision. And for the time being, he could set aside his reasons for supporting it so strongly.
As Michael walked amongst the ladies, who were now deep in conversation about the plans for their newly established school, he found that he was genuinely interested in the situation. He had initially dismissed their efforts as mere folly, only supported by him to alleviate the horrific remorse he felt. But as he listened to their ideas and saw their dedication, he couldn't help but become engrossed in their ambitious project. Part of him was beginning to wish that he had done something more with his life apart from building his grand collection. And he could truly see all the good that would come from the school if it was as successful as the women seemed to think that it would be. And with the way they spoke about it, he was beginning to believe in it as much as they did.
