Page 3 of The Penitent Duke
Biting his lip so as to keep back the very first sharpish thing he was about to say, Lucian grimaced. “You are deeply irritating, Radcliffe.”
“I know that I am and I do not think it a bad thing.”
“You have not always been so.”
At this, the light smile on Lord Radcliffe’s expression faltered. “I do not think that it is I who has changed, my friend.” His tone was quiet but the steadiness in his gaze made Lucian’s mood darken all the more. “I understand that these last few years have been more than a little trying for you but you have become rather… hidden.”
“Hidden?” Finding himself a little offended at his friend’s remarks, Lucian gritted his teeth for a moment. “How dare you suggest that a gentleman ought not to grieve his betrothed?”
Lord Radcliffe’s eyebrows shot towards his hairline. “I did not say such a thing.”
“You suggest that the altering of my character is something to be considered poorly!” Lucian continued, not even listening to his friend. “Are you suggesting, therefore, that the death of my betrothed should have no effect upon my character?” He waited expectantly, quite sure that his friend would either give a defense or rise and make his way from the room –the latter of which, Lucian wanted, truth be told – but instead, Lord Radcliffe only shrugged, settled his hands in his lap and looked back at Lucian steadily.
A heat began to creep up Lucian’s chest, making him frown and look away. There was the pressure of embarrassment and shame seeking to make its way into his heart and more than anything, Lucian did not want to permit it entry. He wanted to remain as he was, tobeas he was, dark and sullen and without any desire for company and yet despite that, Lord Radcliffe continued to trouble him. In his heart, Lucian had to admit that the reason he had said such a thing was not because he believed that Lord Radcliffe was suggesting he ought not to be grieving Lady Pearl but because he wanted his friend to quit the room and leave the estate at once… and it seemed as though Lord Radcliffe knew it.
“I am sorry.”
The words were uttered in a quick, mumbled fashion though Lucian did not look at his friend when he spoke. Instead, he cleared his throat and then rose from his chair, making his way to where the whiskey and brandy sat. “Drink?”
“Please.” Lord Radcliffe’s voice was calm enough though Lucian’s face burned with heat. Quickly, he poured two measures of fine French brandy and then walking back to his seat, handed one to Lord Radcliffe – still without so much as glancing in his direction.
“You did not answer my question.”
Closing his eyes, Lucian let out a long sigh in the hope that Lord Radcliffe would not press him to answer but it was not to be. When he looked at Lord Radcliffe, his friend still held that quizzical, curious expression on his face and was gazing steadily back at him, which meant that Lucian had no choice but to answer.
“I am afraid that I will stand by my statement that you are somewhat irritating with your perusal,” he muttered, rubbing one hand over his eyes. “You force me now to answer.”
“Good for I should very much like to know if you truly do intend to come to London. Society is abuzz with the news!”
Lucian’s scowl returned with force. “Might I ask why?”
“Because,” Lord Radcliffe returned, quickly, “because you are a gentleman who has not been seen in three years, who has refused all company – aside from my own –”
“Which you force upon me.”
“And because your dark manner of late has garnered you something of a reputation, even in your absence,” Lord Radcliffe continued, steadily ignoring Lucian’s sharp interruption. “You have shunned society, haverefused to come to the London Season butnow, this Season, it is said that you will make your return!”
“Only because I must.” Lucian shook his head and sighed, his stomach knotting. “A cousin is to be married and I have been invited. It would be churlish not to attend.”
“I see.” Lord Radcliffe’s lips curved. “You are going to be back in society after all, then. This time, it seems, theton’s whispers have proven true!”
“Indeed, though I do not think much of thetonfor muttering about me when I am absent from their company.”
Lord Radcliffe chuckled, making Lucian’s brow furrow, wondering why his friend was laughing. Evidently seeing this, Lord Radcliffe shrugged and then spread out his hands. “You cannot expect to write harsh, blunt letters to those who invite you to their events without those responses being shared with others,” he said calmly, as though this was something Lucian ought to not only have expected but accept without question. “Thetondo not think favourably of you, my friend.”
“I do not care,” Lucian answered, harshly, ignoring the twist in his gut. “I thinkthemfoolish for their lack of consideration.” He waited for his friend to say something, to respond in some way but all Lord Radcliffe did was look away and then take another sip of his brandy. The twist in Lucian’s gut grew all the stronger, making him wince though he ignored it as best he could.
“I will come to London for the wedding, for the celebration and for nothing more,” he continued, when his friend remained silent. “Then I will return here and continue on as I am.”
“Alone and desolate, then.”
The words snapped out of Lord Radcliffe’s lips and Lucian’s gaze shot back towards his friend.
“Youhavealtered, as I have said,” Lord Radcliffe continued, setting down his brandy glass on the table and then rising to his feet. “Over the last three years, you have pushed everyone away and, indeed, had you had your way, I too would have gone from your company, I am sure! But I am too determined for that,” he continued, sounding almost triumphant as Lucian looked away again, a scowl beginning to pull at his features one more time. “I can see that this is causing you great difficulty, my friend, whether you yourself see it or not.”
“What is causing me difficulty?” His tone was harsh and angry but Lucian made no attempt to change it – and Lord Radcliffe did not seem to be in the least bit concerned by it given the way he continued.
“In pushing others away,” he said, quietly. “In making it quite clear that you have no interest in anyone else’s company, you have effectively isolated yourself almost entirely!”
