Page 31 of Resisting the Temptation
Ugh. Infuriating asshole.
I spent all of Sunday thinking about his offer, writing a pros and cons list and how I feel about him in my journal. Then, I spent Monday and Tuesday pretending nothing happened at the club.
Again.
Every time I close my eyes, I picture him crowding me against the wall. I swear I can still feel his breath against the side of my face as he detailed his offer. My pussy clenches every time I think about it.
Even if his offer feels a lot like exclusivity, even if it’s nothing more than a sexual relationship.
I don’t know if I can do exclusivity after almost four years.
I don’t want to risk falling for him.
I have a list of questions I need answers to before I can agree to his deal. I know he said he doesn't want to bring the club business into work, but I need to be able to have enough time before Saturday to organize my thoughts without getting caught up in the lust of being around him.
We’re in his work truck headed to a job site about an hour away, and I’m trying to muster the courage to bring it up.
Clearing my throat, I say, “I know you don’t want to mix business and pleasure, and I wholeheartedly agree, but in order for me to make an educated decision, I have some questions about your… offer.”
Other than the tense strain of his jaw, I wouldn’t be able to tell he’s affected by my words. “Go ahead and ask them.”
I pull out my notebook and a black pen, turning to the section where I wrote down my questions. “We would only be meeting at the club, correct?”
“Yes.”
“Okay. How often would we be meeting?”
“I think every other Saturday is good. Does that work for you?”
“I can make it work. Would this be… I mean, would you…” I take a deep breath. “Would we be able to have other sexual partners?”
Ben’s jaw works while he considers his answer. “No. If we’re doing this, I don’t want there to be any other variants. It’s safer if we don’t have any other sexual partners.”
“Okay.” My palms start sweating at his answer. I wasn’t expecting that. “What happens if one of us has anurgeand it’s not one of our assigned nights?”
Ben’s arms flex as he adjusts his grip on the steering wheel, and I swear I almost drool. Why are his arms so sexy?
“If we do this, there will be rules. I will ownallof your orgasms. If you have anurgeoutside of our designated time together, then you’ll have to take a cold shower.”
I gape at him. There’s no way he wants me to gotwo weeksat a time without an orgasm. I haven’t gone that long without an orgasm since I had a mono flare up three years ago. “You won’t know if I get off if you aren’t there,” I argue.
“That’s true, but I think you like being a good girl and following directions, especially if the reward is worth it.” He glances over, and I swear I see a flash of heat in his espresso eyes. “Besides, your fingers or a toy wouldn’t be nearly as satisfying as what I can do to you.”
I squeeze my legs together. My slutty vagina agrees. She certainly remembers what he’s capable of, and she gives a wistful sigh at the memory while urging me to say yes.
“Okay, um, I think that’s all of my questions.” It’s not, but I don’t want to talk about this anymore. I shut my notebook and slide it back into my bag.
“Eight o’clock Saturday.”
As if I couldforget.
By Thursday morning I knew I was going to go.
I could say it’s only because I’m curious about kink and want to explore that side of myself, but it’s not the whole truth.
Honestly, as much as the exclusivity aspect of it scares the living shit out of me because I’m scared I’ll get attached, I’m tired of having to find new people to fuck.
The routine of every other Saturday will be helpful and knowing I can trust Ben with my body gives me peace of mind.
