Page 13 of Signed, I'm Yours!
“I’m the insp?—”
“Yeah, I got that. But what’s your name, inspector? I’m Jack Lewis. You are…”
“I’m not Jack Lewis,” he snaps back.
“I didn’t think you were. What is your name though?”
“Jay. I’m Jay. I am Jay.” The last sentence sounds more like he’s trying to convince himself rather than me.
“Jay, what?”
He narrows his eyes and stares into mine when he replies.
“Jay…Walking. That’s right. Jay Walking.”
I bite my lip so I don’t laugh in his face and nod.
“Your name is Jay Walking?”
He grimaces. “Yeah, that’s right. Why? Can I not be named Jay Walking? What do you have against Jay Walkers?”
“Nothing, I swear. It just… it sounds fake, is all. Cute, but fake.” I grimace back.
“Well, I am supposed to be here,” he insists.
“Didn’t say you weren’t, but…you are being very defensive, so it does sound like you’re not supposed to be here.”
“Am so,” he answers, and this time, I can’t help but laugh.
“I’ve worked here for years. We’ve never had inspections. Do you want to tell me what you’re really doing here? Or do you want me to call security?”
“What? Karen and Mortie?” He chuckles dismissively.
I raise an eyebrow. How does he know their names if he’s an intruder? Is he an intruder or just a new SPAM agent who got lost?
I stare at him instead of acknowledging his response.
“You don’t believe me.”
I shrug. “Put yourself in my shoes for a second. If you were me and you saw you, would you believe you?”
“Damn right, I would!”
“Really?” I raise my eyebrow even higher.
“Let me sign something, anything, and I’ll prove it to you,” he says, reaching for a stack of Post-it Notes and a pen.
Before he can sign, I put my hand on the sticky note. “There’s no need to sign anything. Just tell me your name so I can check our database and determine you’re telling the truth.”
“I did tell you my name!”
“Well, Jay…Walking, I meant your real name?”
His mouth twitches from side to side as if he’s trying to come up with his next lie, and I narrow my eyes so he thinks I’m being hard on him.
Truth is, I don’t know if I even look serious. My face is always grinning. Or so I’m told.
“Well, Jack, if you would let me sign—” he starts.
