Page 55 of Take Me Please, Cowboy
“For now, yes.Someday, my sisters will be independent and then it will just be my parents and brother.”
“Jasper will always live at home.”
“Yes.”
“Why didn’t you ever tell me this?”She wasn’t angry with him, but rather, it would have helped to know his world, to understand his commitments.But she couldn’t know him if he didn’t let her in, and he’d never been willing to do that.
“I don’t discuss my family with others, and it has become a habit to protect them.But I wish I’d talked to you, or tried to explain what was happening.Instead, I cut you off thinking it was the best thing for both of us.”
She pushed away from the counter and poured hot water over the tea bag in her cup.“You shouldn’t think for me.I have my own brain and it’s a good one.”
“I didn’t think of it that way.I believed I was tackling the problem head-on, making the necessary decisions—”
“You do realize that’s rather condescending.”
“My dad was injured when I was seventeen.I became the breadwinner in my family then.I had to figure out how to make things work for my family, which wasn’t easy when we were deeply in debt.I didn’t know how to make money, not as a high school senior, but I learned, and I figured out what I needed to do, and I still tend to make decisions first and then deal with the consequences later.”
She sighed and wrapped her hands around the hot mug.“As long as it works for you.”
“It doesn’t.I think you know that.”
Silence stretched, filled with unspoken meaning.
“I’m okay,” Ansley said after another long minute.“You don’t need to worry about me.You have a lot of people to take care of, and a lot of pressure on you.I don’t want to add to that.I refuse to be a burden—”
“You’ve never been a burden.You were the opposite.You were like sunlight and oxygen.”He stopped talking, exhaled.“Next thing I’ll be saying is that art is transformative.I’m sorry—”
“Don’t be.I’m glad we’re talking.We should never have stopped talking.Communication is everything.”
Rye coughed, clearing his throat.“So, are you seeing anyone else?”
“Seriously?”She laughed incredulously.“Not really into dating anyone right now.The last guy banged up my heart a bit.I figured I’d avoid entanglements until I’m ready for fresh rejection.”
“I never stopped caring for you.My feelings for you have never changed.”
“Don’t say that.You’re making it worse.The fact that you could cut me out while havingfeelings blows my mind.”
“Why?”Rye asked, voice low.
“Because if you could do it once, you could do it again, and that’s a risk I couldn’t take.”
“Fair enough.”
“So that’s that.We say goodbye—”
“No.”He softened his tone.“I don’t want to do that, not tonight, not ever again.I can’t, not when I care this much for you.”
“How much?”she demanded.
“I want you to come to Eureka and meet my family.I’ve never introduced anyone to them, but I want you to see where I live, and what I do, and meet my parents, and Jasper.”
“What about your other sister?”
“Hannah is going to school in Missoula, but I’ll ask her to come home.I want you to meet everyone.”
“Why now?”
“Because I have to stop protecting you by making decisions for you.In my mind Eureka was not good enough for you.My situation at home didn’t seem good enough, either.”
