Page 65 of Take Me Please, Cowboy
For a moment, they sat in silence.Ansley had cried the first half hour of her drive out of Eureka, thinking it was over, telling herself she was glad it was over.But with Rye across from her, she knew she didn’t want the relationship to end, just those huge, horrible drops that made her feel as if she was falling.She was tired of falling.She needed something firm beneath her feet.She needed something solid and safe.
She held her cup between her hands, letting it warm her.“I owe you an apology as well,” she said lowly, glancing up at Rye before looking back at her cup.“What I said to my mom had to have been hurtful, and I feel terrible you heard.The last thing I would ever want to do is hurt you, or embarrass you, and I did both.”
“My situation in Eureka isn’t easy.I recognize that.”
“But you do an amazing job of taking care of everyone.”She met his gaze.“You told me the night of the cocktail reception that you were proud of me.Well, I’m proud of you.You work really hard, and you never complain.I wish I was as giving and selfless as you.I wish I’d been more supportive of you.Instead, I was only thinking of myself, and I wasn’t kind, and I’m ashamed of myself—”
“I’d rather know how you truly felt.I’d rather have us confront the problem together than pretend there’s no issue.”
Her eyes stung again, fresh tears filling them.“Do you really feel that way?”
He took her hand in his.“I love you, Ansley.I want you in my life.I want to figure out how to make this work and we can, and will, if that’s what you want, too.”
She blinked.“It’s what I want.”
“Good.”He squeezed her fingers.“But there are obstacles.”
She nodded.“I had a hard time with Eureka.”
“It wasn’t an easy visit, no.”
“I didn’t just struggle with your family.I think it was also the town.I think I arrived prejudiced as I love Marietta so much.Marietta is a special place for me.We met there during the rodeo, and I fell for you there.I’ve imagined opening a gallery of my own there, and I didn’t realize how attached I’ve become to my Marietta dream until I was in your town, trying to imagine myself there, and it wasn’t easy.”
“I thought it was my family.”
She needed a moment to figure out how to say what she needed to say without offending him all over again.“Your family has different dynamics than mine, and perhaps as the youngest in my family I’ve been sheltered more than my older brothers.I was rather overwhelmed, and to be honest, the part that was hardest for me was seeing your mom in your home.”
Rye’s eyes narrowed.“Why my mom?”
“Because she reminds me so much of Josie, and I could picture your mom being Josie when she was younger…” Ansley searched Rye’s eyes, trying to make him understand.“Your mom is beautiful, and kind, and yet she’s had a hard life, and there isn’t a break coming for her.Even if she stops working, she still has your dad and brother to take care of.”
“Did Mom say something to make you feel bad?I’ve never known her to complain—”
“No.” Ansley pulled her hand away from Rye’s.“She’s lovely, sweet, kind.She welcomed me with open arms, but I kept comparing her life to my mom’s.I kept thinking what a difficult life she’s had, and it made me feel sad.It doesn’t seem fair that I’ve had so much, and she hasn’t.”
“Things weren’t always this hard.When dad worked it was better.We weren’t rich, but it wasn’t such a struggle.”
Ansley exhaled, unsettled.“Want to go outside, just walk a bit?”
He nodded and tossed his coffee cup, but she kept hers.
Outside the cool, fresh autumn air helped calm her.They walked a couple blocks before Ansley spoke again.“I have an idea,” she said, glancing at Rye.
“I love ideas,” he said, a hint of a smile playing at the corners of his mouth.
“Well, hopefully this is a good one.”
“Good ideas are the best kind.”
She smiled, relaxing a little.Even if this wasn’t a good idea, at least he wasn’t making her more nervous.“What if we were to come up with a plan?What if we didn’t try to come up with a permanent solution today, but discussed what we could do today so that we could be together more, and then sometime in the future, after we see how it’s going, we consider other options?”
He lifted a brow.“In theory, it sounds good.But how does that work?”
She took a last sip of her coffee and then tossed the cup away as they neared a trash can.“Maybe we start out in Eureka—”
“When you say we, do you mean you’d move there?”
She nodded.“And when your sisters finish school and enter the job market, we could look at moving somewhere else.Perhaps toward Marietta, or maybe even here, to Whitefish.It’s a really cute town.Reminds me a little of Marietta.”
