“I’ll go have a shower and get ready,” she said when she pulled away from me. Giving my cheek a kiss, she got off the bed and stepped into the bathroom, and a few seconds later, the sound of the shower turning on hit my ears.
It’d be a good day. It’d be a break from it all, even if it was only for a little while, which was exactly what I needed. Hunting down a house was exhausting, and looking at my phone and seeing how much money I had in my account was draining every last bit of my energy. I had been saving as much as I could over the years, and it was all for this very moment. I just wished it could be a little bit easier. Maybe I’d go buy a lottery ticket after we had lunch.
But until I sorted that out—and I was determined as all hell to do that—me and Holly could have the day together. We’d do what she said. Find some place nice like we used to where it was just us. I wouldn’t mind painting too. It had been a while since I got to sit down and do that. It’d hopefully work all that stress out, and I always liked watching Holly doing it too, her little tongue poking out as she got all lost in concentration, moving the brush in slow strokes against the canvas.
We needed that. That time for us to be together.
And I was just about to go on my phone and find a place we could visit when I got a message from Mandy.
I FOUND A HOUSE!!! Sending the photos over now. Let me know what you think!
Frowning, I waited for the photos to come through, my thumb hoveringabove the phone of my screen eagerly. My eyes flickered up to the bathroom, the sound of the water running still there in my ears. Holly wouldn’t be in there for much longer. The photos finally showed up and I quickly let my eyes scan up, down, left, right, taking all of it in. It was a nice looking house. One story, big front and back yard, and the best part? A fucking lemon tree right there in the back. Tall and looming with the freshest looking lemons I had ever seen.
This was it. This was the house. It had to be. It had everything.It hadthat fucking lemon tree.
Another text came through from Mandy before I could even reply.
There are other buyers who are interested! We gotta move fast if you want it. Let me know what you want to do.
Christ. I quickly grabbed my shoes before fumbling around for the keys to the truck, shoving them into my jeans pocket just as Holly came out in a towel.
“Why don’t we have breakfast at the diner?” Holly asked. “I’m in the mood for waffles. Clara makes the best ones. Are you hungry?”
Fuck, I was the worst boyfriend ever. There Holly stood, all wide eyed and hopeful, hands grasping the cheap white towel against her chest. I took slow steps towards her, already hating myself for what I was about to say.
“Holly.” I sighed. “I gotta… I gotta head out.”
The smile on her face faltered. It all happened so fast. If I had blinked, I would have missed it. She forced that smile right back—but I had seen it. That disappointment, that frustration, and I was the source of it.
“Oh,” she said. “Okay, sure.”
“I’m sorry.”
Her head shook, that fake smile there on her face. I knew what her real smile looked like, and she wasn’t giving me that. “I get it. You have… stuff… to do. It’s fine.”
“I’m seeing my mom,” I lied, and it felt like someone had punched me in the stomach when I did that. When I blatantly lied right to her face. It waslike I was taking all her trust and doing something bad with it. “She just messaged me.”
And just like that, her eyes softened, and that guilt sitting on my chest tripled.
“Oh,” she whispered, head tilting. “Is everything okay?”
“I’m gonna go see her.” Reaching forward, I held Holly’s waist and gave her a kiss. I needed to leave before the lies piled up more. “We’re gonna hang out, I guess. Nothing to worry about. I’m sorry about today.”
Holly nodded. “Don’t be sorry. You’re allowed to go see your mom. I hope you guys have a lovely time together.”
I held in a frustrated groan and just kissed her again. “I’ll see ya tonight, Holly. You go get that breakfast, okay? Eat without me. It’s fine.”
I moved over to the door, staring at Holly in that towel. She still had that hopeful look in her eyes, like she wanted everything to go well with me and my mom as if I really was about to go see her. It had me yanking the doorknob tight. I wanted today to be one of the last days I saw her in a motel room. This time next month, I wanted to be opening up the front door to our house, to our home, to the place we’d spend forever. I needed that to come next.
“I love you, Holly,” I said, standing there in the doorway.
She gave me a little smile. “I love you too.”
My heart felt a little heavy as I left, quickly making my way downstairs and to the truck. The photos of the house that Mandy had sent over flashed in my mind. The place looked perfect. It didn’t look like a house, it looked like a home. The kind that Holly dreamed of, but I didn’t just want it to be some fuzzy vision she saw in her head. I wanted to make it real.
I was going to.
Chapter 21