Page 88 of Infinite as They Come
“You can, you just don’t want to.”
He exhaled sharply. “I don’t want this to turn into fight.”
“I think it already did, like, five minutes ago,” I said, picking up a napkin and tearing at the corner.
“Right.”
“I deserve honesty. I’m entitled to a little honesty, especially when you’ve been acting so strange. When you’re clearly keeping things from me.”
“What about you?” he said.
My head shook, shrugging at the question. “What about me?”
His tongue clicked, fingers tapping against the diner table as his eyes traveled to the window right by us. “What about that job offer you got?”
“What are…” My brows pulled together. “You went through my stuff? Through my computer?”
He held his hands up. “I didn’t go through it. You left it open and it was there and I looked for a second. It’s not like I was snooping and I shut it as soon as I could.”
“Okay, so? Some place offered me a role? So what?”
“So what?” He sat up a little straighter. “Not just some place, Holly, a place in New York.”
“Right, and?”
“You didn’t tell me about it. Were you planning on telling me about it?”
“Do you want me to forward you every email I get?”
“It’s not about that. It’s about the place. It’s about the fact that maybe that’s where you would rather be.”
“Is that what you think? That I want to go back?”
“I mean, you and New York City make sense. Maybe you wanna go back. Maybe you’re looking for jobs back there. New York is the kinda place a girl like you belongs, so I understand if you wanna go back.”
My eyes rolled. God, I hated this. I hated it when we fought like this, because it always felt too serious and heavy. We weren’t like this. We were usually all staring into each other’s eyes, holding hands, me on his lap, our lips pressed together. Not this. Not this awful bitterness in our words. The uncomfortableness. God, even when we used to go at each other’s throats it never felt awkward and stiff like what was surrounding us right now.
Sawyer cocked a brow. “Well?”
“Well, what?”
He swiped a heavy thumb across his jaw. “Are you gonna take it? Are you going back?”
“Are you seriously asking me that?”
“Does is sound like I’m not being serious?”
“What do you want me to say, Sawyer?”
“Tell me. Tell me if you want to go back to New York, if that’s the life you want. Back in the city.” He swallowed hard. “I won’t stop you. I won’t hold you back, Holly. I don’t ever wanna get in the way of you doing what you want, of you living the life you wanna have. If New York is where you wanna be, then tell me. Tell me so I know, so I understand where we stand.”
“You say that like I’m the one keeping secrets.”
“You didn’t tell me about the offer. About the email. The question is easy enough, Holly. Do you want to go back to New York or not? Is that the life you want? If you’ve been making plans, if you have all these dreams, then I have to know.”
I scoffed. “You’re asking me that when I’ve barely even seen you lately? Are you serious? There’s no reason for you to think that.”
“You didn’t tell me you got that offer, Holly. I don’t know why else you’d keep it to yourself.”
