Page 102 of Your Sharpest Edge
Alex: I see you.
Friday:
Alex: I miss you.
Damien was playing with his Legos, the colorful pieces scattered all over the living room floor. Each click and clack of the connecting bricks echoed in the room. I glanced at him, his little brow furrowed in concentration, and it brought a smile to my face. The nervousness about tonight was eating me up inside.
As I sat there, my phone buzzed again. Another text from Alex.
Alex: What are you wearing?
Before I replied, Alina walked into the room. She took one look at me, clearly noticing my flustered state, and smiled knowingly.
“Getting ready for tonight?”
“Yeah, I'm a bit nervous.” I lied.
I was so anxious. I had worked all morning, and by the time I picked up Damien after work, I had considered texting Alex to cancel our date at least a hundred times. Other than when I was pregnant, I had never been out with him alone. Plus, I hated not knowing the plan.
Over the years, my injuries and past made me controlling. I overcompensated for the loss of control by demanding detailed plans from my doctors and knowing every side effect of my meds. I always needed to know exactly where and when we were meeting, ensuring I had enough time to get Damien and myself ready while accounting for any pain flare-ups that might cause delays. This was new territory for me, and I knew that if I textedAlex for details, he’d give them willingly, but he was so excited to surprise me.
“You’ll be fine. What are you wearing, and what’re you packing?”
I motioned for her to follow me into my bedroom, where my clothes were scattered everywhere, along with an open overnight bag. I’d already packed for Damien earlier this week, so he was set to stay at Ledger’s.
“I’m not sure yet. I was thinking about that blue dress.” I hesitated. “Then I was thinking maybe I should pack this?” I held up a blue lingerie piece that my mother, of all people, had picked out for me and sent me from back home.
“Oh.” Alina’s eyes widened. “But you said you were saving that until you slept with someone who deserved to see it...” Putting the pieces together, she hesitated for a moment, then ran up to me and grabbed my wrists. “You’ve slept with him, haven’t you?”
My face flushed, and she squeaked in excitement. “Oh. My. God. Tell me everything. How was it?” Alina laughed, throwing herself on the bed. “I bet he’s got a big schlong.”
I paused, then burst into laughter, quickly covering my mouth to stifle the chuckle. “He was so big. I was honestly shocked.” I couldn’t believe I just said that. “But it was really good. He was really understanding.”
She sat up. “I’m so proud of you.” She grabbed the lingerie. “Weird your mom sent this to you?—”
“She wanted me to start dating again. My mom means well in life, but she goes about things in such strange ways.”
“Like sending you lingerie to go get your kitty wet.”
“Ew. When you say it like that,” I laughed. “But yes, exactly.”
I threw the piece of lingerie in the overnight bag along with several pairs of underwear. I grabbed pajamas, a pair of sweatsand jeans, and a T-shirt for tomorrow. Thankfully tomorrow was my day off, so I didn’t need to worry about work.
“I still don’t know what to wear tonight.” I looked at the clothes strewn on the bed.
Alina hopped off the bed. “What did Alex say the dress code was?”
“He said it’s casual, but nice,” I replied, biting my lip. “Why?”
“Then why not wear that denim dress you made? It’s cute and unique, plus it fits the dress code,” she suggested.
“But I made it,” I huffed.
“Yeah, exactly why you should wear it.”
I pulled out the denim dress, crafted from recycled jeans. I’d come a long way since I first started sewing, and for a moment, the memory of making Alex that shirt in his living room made me laugh.
“I think I’ll go with this one.” Putting back the denim dress, I grabbed another one from the rack. “This one is new.”
