Page 23 of Sorry, Not Sorry
Salome winced, and Delilah instantly felt remorseful. She knew only too well why her sister felt the need to control her environment, but suppressing her own needs and ambitions was clearly having a detrimental effect.
‘I just want it to be different for my kids than it was for us,’ Salome said quietly. ‘You know what? Forget it! I shouldn’t have said anything to you – that’s what Alison’s for,’ she added.
Delilah looked sceptical but Salome shook her head decisively. ‘I mean it, hon, don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine. Right then, change of subject. How’re you feeling after what happened with Carl?’
When she put her mind to it, Salome could be twice as stubborn as Delilah on a good day, and judging from the look on her sister’s face, Delilah knew nothing she said would make her talk if she didn’t want to. Making a mental note to find another opportunity to return to the conversation, she went along with Salome’s wishes.
‘You read Carl’s messages – take a guess how I’m feeling after finding yet another man who hates me! After all his antics, apparently I’m the one who’s so toxic that he refuses to meet me. So it looks like I have to settle for forgiveness by text this time.’
Delilah couldn’t help the slight tremor in her voice, and it was Salome’s turn to study her sister.
‘Del,’ she started hesitantly. ‘Can I ask what you’re learning from all this? I mean, about how you’ve managed your relationships?’
‘Christ, you sound exactly like Arne!’ Delilah groaned. ‘Well, if you really want to know, my biggest takeaway is finding out every man I’ve dated thinks I’m a first-class bitch.’
‘Don’t talk about my sister like that!’ Salome said with a loud tut. ‘I do like the sound of your Viking therapist, though, and he must be doing something right if you’re still seeing him.’
‘It’s not like I have a choice, is it?’ Delilah said moodily. ‘It’s either Mondays with Arne or never getting my job back. To be fair, he’s not awful. He’s actually starting to grow on me, but he definitely does not shy away from asking some tough questions.’
‘Good,’ Salome said briskly. ‘So put your back into it and finish the job. Who’s next on your list?’
‘Your list, you mean. I tried Remi’s number a couple of days ago, but I couldn’t get through, so I called his office. Don’t look at me like that – you wrote that stupid list! Anyway, turns out he’s travelling on business. Brazil, apparently.’
‘Which leaves you with the final name on the list. And, as you’ve just pointed out, I wrote the list, so we both know who that is. So, tell me, exactly how long are we going to keep ignoring that massive grey elephant in the room – and when are you going to call Noah?’
Delilah trained her gaze on the floor, contemplating the question. Since the day she had seen Noah’s name on Salome’s list, scarcely a night had gone by without him showing up somewhere in her dreams. No matter how hard she tried not to think about him, her mind appeared to have other ideas. The sleepless nights and troubled dreams couldn’t continue indefinitely and, deep down, Delilah knew it was time.
‘He changed his number after we broke up. I know that, because I tried calling him a few weeks after – well, you know – and it was disconnected. There’s no chance his witch of a mother will give me his contacts, so I’ve got no idea where to find him or?—’
‘I’ve got his number,’ Salome cut in. ‘And his home address.’
‘What?’ Delilah’s eyes bulged in disbelief. ‘How…?’
‘He gave it to me a few months ago. Well, not gave it to me exactly…’ She ruminated in silence while Delilah bounced up and down on the sofa with frustration.
‘Salome!’
‘Okay, okay! I bumped into him outside the house one day and asked if he could put me in touch with the gardener that cuts the grass in his mum and dad’s garden. He texted me Ben’s number – and the man’s been a godsend! Farhan never has time to mow the lawn, and at one point we had so many weeds, I was terrified of letting the kids out.’
Delilah held up a hand to cut off the rambling. ‘I get it, you’ve got his number. But how the hell did you get his address?’
‘I asked Mrs West. Told her I wanted to send him a thank you card. Like I said, Ben’s been an absolute godsend.’
Delilah was still trying to make sense of Salome’s admission. ‘You mean, you’ve known all this time… but… but why didn’t you say?’
Salome shook her head. ‘That’s not important,’ she said impatiently. ‘What matters is you know how to contact Noah, so get on with it! You’ll have to face him at some point to ask his forgiveness, and the sooner you do it, the sooner you’ll get your job back.’
17
‘What made you decide to become a therapist, Arne?’
Arne sat back, contemplating Delilah’s question, and a ray of sunshine through the window blinds crossed his face, highlighting glints of gold in his fiery-red beard.
‘Perhaps for the same reason you turned to counselling,’ he said eventually. ‘I wanted to help people. Help them understand what they want for themselves and what drives them into decisions and behaviour that sabotages that success.’
She studied him curiously. ‘And has the job been what you expected?’
‘You wish to ask all the questions today, Delilah?’ He raised a bushy eyebrow and cracked a rare smile, and she grinned back from where she sat curled up in the oversized armchair.
