Page 84 of Royally Wed
He opened his eyes. His consciousness was screaming at him, drowning out everything else.Don’t do it. Don’t look at her.
But his attention was drawn toward Amelia like a magnet. He was powerless to stop it. Every cell in his body was aware of her presence.
At last, he looked at her. The church went suddenly, jarringlysilent. The quiet seemed to descend from the rafters, blanketing everything below. At first, the noiselessness was a relief. Asher was on sensory overload. The sight of Amelia in that dress again had a sent such a powerful shot of arousal surging through him that he nearly dropped his bow. It wasn’t until the cellist seated beside Asher cleared his throat that he finally snapped to attention, realizingwhat the loaded silence had meant.
He’d missed the entry for his solo. Yet again.
He picked up his bow and let his eyes drift shut. He’d never get through this if he had to look at Jeremy. Or the television cameras. Or the posh congregation in their fascinators and morning suits. So he shut them all out. Hewasn’t playing for them anyway. He wasn’t even playing for himself.
He was playing forher.
Because this was it, wasn’t it? Whatever happened now, however his performance went, would be the way she remembered him. There’d be no parting words, no drawn-out good-byes. He would never kiss her again. Never touch her. Never whisper all the things he hadn’t had the courage to say when he’d had her in his bed.
Don’t do it.
Don’t marry him.
You deserve better. You deserve the world.
Would it have changed things if he’d said it? Would she have climbed into that glass coach like this was a fairy tale instead of a nightmare in the making?
Words had never been Asher’s strong suit. But he could say those things now, couldn’t he? He could say them the only way he knew how—through his music.
He slid his bow over the D string for the opening prelude. A soulful, silky note filledthe air. It was the purest thing Asher had ever heard. He paused, just long enough for it fade into silence, then he played the next note and the next one after that. One note at a time, just like when he’d sat down at the piano in the palace and started with a simple C chord.
He leaned into the music, chasing the notes and letting them swell in intensity. They began to build on one another,overlapping in the air, like birds in flight.
He could feel the melody vibrating through him, starting at his fingertips and coursing through his body. The musicwas in his blood, in his soul, and it was all her. All Amelia. Pictures of their time together soared through his consciousness, memories he couldn’t quite grasp onto. He could feel them slipping through his fingers, like water. So heplayed harder and harder, with more feeling, more fervor, as if he could drive the memories home with his bow.
The music swelled, yet it was as soft and luxurious as velvet. Perfectly balanced. Rich, but also delicate. Powerful, but at the same time, wafting and gentle.
The memories were coming fast and strong now, with the gentle beauty of a dream—Amelia’s hair fanned out on his pillow, thesoft swell of her lower lip, her sleepy smile.
He could see her now, sitting astride him in the dark. He could hear her cries, feel the shudder of her spine against his palms as her body pulsed around his cock. And he realized she’d done more than love him last night.
She’d put the music back in him.
It was her parting gift.
Or maybe he’d needed to lose it in order to find it again. He wouldn’ttoss it away. Not this time. He was back. Back for good. He’d learned something about loss since coming here. Sometimes it was choice. Even if it wasn’t, you could fight it. You could scream in the face of it without even saying a word.
Asher’s arm moved back and forth in a fury until his bow struck the final note, and when at last the sonata came to its shattering conclusion, he opened his eyesand fixed his gaze with Amelia’s.
She was a beautiful bride.
They stared at one another as the nave burst intoapplause. Amelia’s eyes were shiny with unshed tears. Her lips parted, like she was about to speak, but couldn’t quite find the words. He wouldn’t have heard her anyway... not over the cheers of the wedding guests.
Asher’s ears rang. His heart beat hard in his chest. Adrenalinesurged through him in a continuous hum, like an electric current that made his legs shake and his breath come in shallow gasps.
But his hands were steady as a rock.
He’d poured his heart and soul into his piece. He’d said his good-byes. He’d just given the performance of a lifetime. And now...
... now he was done. Finished.
Asher stood.
With his gaze still fixed on Amelia’s, he droppedhis bow. It fell to the ground and bounced at his feet.
Then he set his cello down, turned, and walked right out of the Abbey.
