Fuck.
 
 Why had he left her? If he hadn’t gone when Donovan called he would have been there.
 
 He could have protected her.
 
 Instead, he’d assumed she would be fine and he’d gone to help Donovan. And then instead of going to check on Devi, he’d gone to Sondra.
 
 It was like May all over again. He’d left on deployment and assumed she would be fine without him.
 
 But she hadn’t been.
 
 History couldn’t repeat itself. She couldn’t die.
 
 He wasn’t sure that he could live with that.
 
 “Someone stabbed her with a knife,” Honey told him.
 
 What. The. Fuck.
 
 Breathe. Just breathe.
 
 You cannot pass out.
 
 “A knife? Why? Where was her father?” he managed to ask.
 
 “She told us that these guys attacked her and kidnapped her father,” Zander told him. “But also that it was his fault. Have any idea what that means?”
 
 Fuck. Shit.
 
 “Not sure, all I know is that her father is an alcoholic.”
 
 “Poor girl. Her old man is an alcoholic and her brother is in jail for a murder he didn’t commit. Think this attack has anything to do with the brother?” Zander asked.
 
 “I don’t know.” He hated that he had no idea.
 
 “She didn’t mention anyone else yet someone had done some First-Aid on her arm before we got there,” Zander told him.
 
 Someone who helped her but hadn’t stuck around or called an ambulance?
 
 “Could be a few hours before she’s out of surgery,” Honey added. “Can we get you anything? Food? Coffee?”
 
 “No, nothing.” Fuck. He wanted to hunt down the people who had done this but he also knew he couldn’t leave her. “I need you to find out who did this.”
 
 Zander nodded. “Honey, stay with Hayes. What about Donovan?”
 
 “Gone back to the Steins’,” Hayes said. “He’ll deal with Sondra.”
 
 “All right, then we’ll go hunting,” Zander said. “That is my favorite sport, after all.”
 
 Hayes didn’t have it in him to respond. He thought he might be in shock. Everything around him felt hazy.
 
 “Come on, big guy. Sit down before you fall. You’re built like a huge redwood. I don’t know if I could move one of your legs let alone that trunk.”
 
 He gave Honey a look of disbelief. “I don’t need to be managed.”
 
 “Managed? I wouldn’t do that. I just think you should sit, is all. But hey, you do you, Boo.”
 
 Fuck.