Page 52 of Meet You Half Way
“Yep. He’s also Mateo’s best friend so he’s not going anywhere.”
“Gee, talk about complicated.”
“Believe me. I know. So the risk is if I say something he’ll just walk away from me because I know he won’t choose me over his best friend and I don’t even really want that. His ex is a really great guy. I’m not sure I can risk that.”
“But Jamie, maybe it would be better to know now so that you’re not in so deep you can’t leave. Surely that would be worse.”
I sighed, the sound heavy to my heart. “I don’t know what would be worse,” I admitted.
“Talk to him,” Kelly reiterated. “I don’t know why that is so hard for you men.”
“Hey,” Bill piped in.
“Not you of course, darling,” she grinned, scrunching her nose at him adorably. And that right there, just those simple moments between two people who loved each other was what I really wanted. What I’d always wanted. Could Mateo be that guy for me? I wanted him to be, wanted him to be so badly I couldn’t let myself give in to those thoughts. Because the sad truth was that I just didn’t think Mateo would ever let himself be that for me.
But then I thought more about the past few weeks, how much closer we had been getting. All the coffees we’d shared at Cat’s Cradle. Our walk on the beach. How he had let me meet Dante and Giulia. All those nights we had spent together and I wasn’t just thinking of the sex although that alone was enough to make me weep. I’d fallen asleep with him in my arms and woken up to find him still there enough times to know we really had something.
Maybe Kelly was right. Maybe I just needed to know if Mateo could see a future for us together. Whether he could ever getover his ex-boyfriend who had clearly moved on with his own life with his new man.
But was I prepared for his answer? And was I okay with always being his second choice?
Now that was a whole other question.
CHAPTER 21
mateo
“Alittle more to the left,” I said, standing back and watching as Nick and Rob hefted the heavy wooden tallboy into the corner of the room. “No, back to the right an inch.”
“How about you help with the actual manual labour instead of just providing the commentary,” Rob huffed, standing back and wiping the sweat from his brow.
“No thanks, I’m perfectly happy standing here supervising,” I grinned, not minding the display of all their man muscles all that much either.
“I’m sure you are,” Rob returned.
“Hey, you’re the one who wanted to switch bedrooms,” I pointed out, reasonably so.
“You’re the reason I needed to switch bedrooms in the first place,” Rob jabbed right back. Nick laughed and that had me quietening down, hoping Rob wouldn’t bring up the reason for his sudden move to the bedroom on the other side of the house again – Nick’s old room before I’d chased him out of our house. It was bad enough the first time Rob had brought it up, me just standing there while he teased me about how Jamie and I hadnearly sent the bed through the drywall the other night, Nick looking on with a grin on his face.
“Now you can send as many beds into the wall as you want,” Nick added. It was the first time he had alluded to me being with Jamie and I felt my stomach reliably twist at his words, just casually joking about me having sex with another guy like it was nothing.
“And now you can take up all the space in the bathroom with all your beauty products,” Rob added, landing a heavy arm over my shoulder.
“Small blessings,” I muttered, glad for the change of subject.
“You want to put those perfectly smooth, anti-manual-labour hands of yours to good use and crack out the beers?” Rob asked. Which was probably fair considering how much work these two had done shifting Rob’s furniture while I had carried over the blankets and clothes.
“Deal,” I agreed, turning and leaving them to finish off the room. Truthfully, this was a good thing, Rob’s move to the other side of the house. We probably should have done it a while ago but I guess we’d both been holding onto the hope that Nick might return. That was even less likely now with the only spare bedroom in the house the one that shared a wall with mine. Neither of us were that mean.
I organised the beers and then added some cheese and crackers and brought them over to the coffee table where the guys had collapsed onto the sofa.
“Got any trips up to Sydney planned, M?” Rob asked, arms out on either side of him.
“Actually, I have to be up there the weekend after next,” I told them. “Got a photoshoot booked.”
“You going up to visit Ajay too?” Rob continued, eyes on Nick.
“You bet,” Nick replied with a soft smile on his face I didn’t want to investigate too closely.
