Page 32 of In the Safety's Zone
His mindset was far more mature than somebody who was only a year older than me. I’d had to grow up early because of all my responsibilities before I was barely a teenager. But out of his own mouth he’d said that he’d been spoiled until his issues in college. He moved like a man who’d seen a thousand lifetimes and had kept the lessons and the emotional intelligence from each.
I’d left home to play in a smaller tournament before I needed to get to the French Open and as always my parents hadn’t questioned where I’d been overnight. I beat my father homeand my mother just wanted to grill me about where he was and who he was with. She couldn’t find the time to be bothered with actual concern for her kid.
Instead of going through the normal motions of being disappointed with her behavior I had something else to distract me from the pinch of pain that accompanied their neglect. But the distraction was one that had me believing that all relationships weren’t as challenged as then with my family.
“Is it crazy if I say I miss you?”
“Oh, you’re not playing about me?” I giggled as I wrapped my body in my silk robe. We were on a video call and I could see that he was lying on his bed.
He grinned at my joke showing off his teeth, which were so pretty I’d asked him if they were veneers. “Shut up, Phro. I’m just…missing your vibe is all. That shit was something intense but beautiful as fuck and I got so much going on it was good to forget that for a minute.”
He shifted in the bed exposing more of his bare chest. We’d talked about how he was working out, hoping to be picked up for at least the practice squad this year. I loved the fact that Anthony knew he was talented but was also extremely humble about his chances. His hope mixed with the reality of his situation made me root for him even harder.
I sat on the hotel bed looking at how his features had shifted. “What’s going on?”
“Nothing too crazy just focusing on goals but not wanting to neglect you. Your next match is in France, right?”
“Yeah, but the last thing we need to do is stop being friends with each other just cause it might lead to something deeper.”
“Oh, you trying to get me to go deep?” His voice dropped and had a thread of seduction laced through it. My teeth went to my lip as I tried not to moan out loud thinking about our night in New York. I’d gotten myself off many nights to that memory.
“And you flirting with me? Be careful; you never know what I might do to your ass.”
“Ditto. You wouldn’t want to miss out on a match cause I rearranged them guts.”
My thighs clenched together and I wanted to say something but I wasn’t sure what. I’d already shot my shot with him once and I didn’t feel like embarrassing myself again.
“Why you talking all this big talk when we were together—”
“That was about you. To be real, you don’t seem like the type of girl that just goes anywhere for a good time. One thing I notice about people is their intentions and yours were pure.”
“So what was the problem?”
I hated to sound like this girl but damn the one time I want to be adventurous I got shot down. Well, I got some phenomenal head so that wasn’t true, but still.
“Because it was pure I wasn’t about to fuck with that. If we just hooked up and didn’t go further than that then I would’ve played a part in dimming that purity. And I’m not talking about that weird purity church folks are obsessed with. I’m talking the type that makes you see people in an unjaded way. It’s refreshing and I wouldn’t want to be the reason that was fucked up.”
“Damn, that’s noble.” I hated that his words made me feel special. Not that I was going to regret anything about sleeping with him, but he had me feeling like he had me in his sights for something real.
“Not noble. I know how it feels to be the person that life fucks over. I would never want to be the cause of those feelings in someone else. There are plenty of marks against me and I wouldn’t want one against you.”
“I’m special or something?”
“Hell yeah, you shouldn’t even have to ask me that.”
“Damn, you’re talking like you mean it and it makes me believe it.”
“You should. I know stuff is going to get busy because of everything we have going on between the two of us, but I wasn’t joking when I said I was protective of you when we were in New York. Wherever I gotta go to get to you, I’m more than ready to fly. Got my passport and everything.”
I had to remember that there were things that I’dd taken for granted, like trips out of the country since I was born because we had to follow behind my father.
“I wouldn’t have you doing that—”
“No, I’d have me do it because I care to. I’d want to because we are building and I would want to be that to you.”
“What do you want to be to me?”
“If I’m being real?”
