Page 39 of In the Safety's Zone
I jerked back but I couldn’t help but grin because she delivered that barb smooth as fuck. “Gotdamn I was waiting for it and it still took me by surprise. Just throwing my past straight in my face like that?”
“How else you want me to give it to you? I’m going to be tough on you because trust me honey the media will be far worse. They’ll call you everything but a child of God and you’re supposed to sit there and take it. I believe in you, but I damn sure ain’t about to coddle you. The old Anthony would’ve expected that shit, but something tells me the one sitting in front of me doesn’t.”
I nodded because she was only doing what I apparently couldn’t pay her more to do this year. “You’re right.”
She waved me off like my confirmation wasn’t necessary. “I know, I just needed to give you that reminder about yourself because I could see the doubt start to creep in. I’m not aboutto talk behind your back but I’m also not going to kiss your ass. Your brother knows how I operate better than anyone. If he didn’t give you the advice before you got here be mad at him. He knew you needed to get your chin checked. So, I need to go cuss his ass out because he got me doing the heavy lifting his ass should’ve done before you left the house to bring your ass over here.” Her face was balled up like she was truly fed up with the both of us.
“Got—well damn how I get ‘Twan in trouble just sitting here?”
She rolled her eyes before she went back to saying what she needed to. “Don’t ask too many questions before you dig him in even deeper. Now, this is what I was trying to say before your ego interrupted. This is a deal that we do for players who are just entering into the league because we need you to have enough available capital so that you can eat, live and perform with enough money for the year so you don’t do something stupid. And I am blessed enough not to need to take food out of your mouth to put food on my table. So stop trying to block your blessings.”
I shifted in my seat damn near itching to get up and expend some of my pent-up energy. “I feel like I’m at the principal’s office or getting cussed out by somebody’s mama. How many times you gone read my ass, Billy?”
She flashed as she swiveled from side to side in her chair with her legs crossed. A beautiful smile that I was sure had muhfuckas more focused on her face than her words. “As many times as you need so that you can gather yourself. You’ve learned your lesson from that shit, right?”
I didn’t hesitate to answer her. “Yes.”
“I thought so. Now, there are plenty of people clamoring at the idea of you and your brother stepping into your first season as a roster player and not just scout team. Folks are going to bethrowing money at you left and right. The idea of having both Phillips representing their brand will have people locally and nationally trying to get y’all signed on.”
“That’s crazy to think. I mean, maybe in a few seasons but I ain’t even done anything too big yet to have people coming at me like that with offers.”
I’d finished talking but she sat silently in her chair with her arms folded. “You done?”
“Uh, yeah?”
“Good. I was just trying to see if you were just hell-bent on being a sad ass, self-sabotaging muthafucka. Now are you gone hush and listen so I can put money in your pocket?”
“Billy, I hear you. But I don’t want people to think I only got here because of my brother.”
I hated that it was a sticking point for me but it was. My brother had enough people trying to eat off him that didn’t deserve it. From extended family that never gave a fuck about us to our mama trying to emotionally blackmail him. More than ever, I wanted to get everything on my own, not out of competition but out of my desire not to be a burden to him.
“Here’s the thing you have to understand Ant, can I call you Ant?” She threw my words back at me and I laughed at her being silly.
“You already did so you might as well keep the party jumping.”
“Smart ass. Like I was saying, there is always going to be somebody in this world who will hate on you because of the advantages that you had. Advantages that you reaped the benefit of because of your brother. But none of that shit was on the football field. It was the real-life shit that Antwan made shake so that you could go to prep school, have conditioning coaches and everything else. You didn’t have it easy but you didn’t have it as hard as some and people will always have something to say. Butit was still your talent that shone through all that. I’m not one of these people who shits on nepotism. You think I’m grinding this hard for my babies to start from the bottom? Fuck no. They're gonna know how to be good stewards of their shit but if they eat off my name or get ahead because of it then I did my job right. Now if you got this position just because of your brother and you sucked? That’s one thing. But you know the quickest way to shut a bitch up?”
I sat back cause I felt like she was gone say some shit that would hit my soul. “I feel like you about to tell me.”
“You go out there and you put in the fucking work. You do everything it is you need to do to let them know you earned every snap, every penny that theDesperadoshave and will pay you. Eery time they see your face on the cover of a magazine or smiling in an ad, they can sit there and wonder, ‘How did he get this opportunity?’ And while they’re sittin’ there letting you live rent-free in their head, you’re on the field and in the gym making yourself even better to continue to give them reasons to talk. Cause what are they truly accomplishing sitting here thinking about you?”
“Nothing.”
She nodded her head emphatically and damn if I wasn’t wanting to jump out of this seat and make some shit shake. “Absolutely fuck all.”
“You're real…candid when you get passionate.”
“I’m a woman of many talents. Don’t let these degrees, this ring or those kids fool you. Coby isn’t the only one in this family that can inspire legions, he just gets to do it every Sunday. Hell, who do you think gets him hyped up? Now, if I’m done preaching a sermon I hadn’t set out to today, are we about to sign this deal or what?”
“I feel like if I left out of here unsigned you’d probably whoop my ass.”
“I definitely would. But then again, it ain’t my future I’d be trusting to just any ole body so the next move is yours.”
“I’m never stupid in life. At least not anymore.”
“Facts. Besides, I can’t have you out here with your name linked to my little sister if you're not gone move smart.”
My brow furrowed because I didn’t know anything about her little sister so I was confused. “Your little sister? I mean Yzabel is fine and all—”
