“Yeah, but you couldn’t care less if other people start talking about that shit, and Milo here will eagerly jump in...when you’re not around, then he’s more careful sharing,” she said with a shrug. “It’s interesting...and kind of funny. Both of you avoiding the other’s sexuality.”
I wrinkled my nose. “What? How the hell do I avoid him being straight? And he doesn’t give a fuck that I’m gay.”
“Sexuality,” she repeated as she stood up, and I had to be impressed with her tie job because, despite how heavy the blanket was, it didn’t slip as she got to her feet. “Not sexual orientation. Sexuality is just how your sexual feelings and experiences show, how you do things. You both avoid the sexual sides of each other as much as possible despite sharing every other side...more than you share with other people, I bet.”
“Eva,” Eli growled, and while I could hear the warning in his voice, I couldn’t figure out what it was about. She gave him a tired look, and he scowled harder, to which she rolled her eyes and flopped her hands in a gentle surrender. Eli had had the exact sort of silent conversation with me more than enoughtimes over the years for me to recognize that he was telling her to drop what was probably an old conversation they had had before. I clearly didn’t know a thing about it and couldn’t help but be curious about what I was missing out on.
I didn’t like him keeping secrets from me, but I quickly schooled my face before either could read my expression. Eli knew me too well, and Eva was too good, plus I knew I tended to broadcast everything on my face as it was.
“Uh, anyway,” I said, making them look at me in surprise and then embarrassment. “I bought tacos. Thought it was probably too much for us, but since you’re here, Eva, why don’t you join us?”
She grinned. “Aw, you brought me food?”
“I brought us food, but bought way too damn much, so you might as well have some and enjoy it,” I corrected her with a snort. “If I’d known you’d be here, I’d have bought even more.”
“I suppose that counts as thoughtful,” she said, laughing. “But I think I’ll get dressed first.”
“I put your clothes on the bed,” Eli muttered, and I spared a thought for how they’d stripped in his room but somehow were in the living room. I grimaced, knowing it was better not to go too far down that rabbit hole. It would come far too close to thinking about what Eli was like in sexual moments, about how he might be aggressive, drawing her down the hallway and maybe stopping to do all sorts of things to her on the way, and then immediately wonder what that had to be like. Especially because Eva’s drunken loose lips had already drawn me a good enough picture to work with, and I was trying not to work with it.
Eli waited until she was gone, the door closing behind her as he turned. “Sorry about that.”
“I mean, I walked in pretty quietly, and I’m back early,” I shrugged uncomfortably as I laid out the food and picked upmy phone. “Plus, you’ve come home when I was having sex and making a noise.”
“Yeah, I guess,” he said uncomfortably.
“It’s fine,” I said, trying to sound like I meant it as I opened up the messages from Raf I’d missed. He had decided to take a break from his cleaning and was alone for long enough to snap a picture of himself. It was a downward angle shot, showing the entire stretch of his admittedly fantastic body, hips jutting forward as he gripped the base of his hard cock on full display.
God, I’d been over here thirsting over my stepbrother while myboyfriendwas sending me dirty texts. Shame flushed through me for a minute as his follow-up text told me I was supposed to come to his place, or he could come over to mine.
But no...it was the perfect opportunity to take all the frustration and arousal I’d felt and do something with it. I was attracted to Raf, and all I had to do was picture his large, strong hands closing around me and holding me in place as he pushed into me, and now I had somewhere else to put all that energy. I could take it all and use it to ensure he and I had a good time.
Just how unsupervised are you right now?I asked him.
His text came back fast.All alone.
I didn’t need the winking emoji to know what he wanted; right then, I wanted it too. Maybe even needed it as a kind of perfectly moral brain bleach that could get me through.
“Actually,” I said, pushing the food toward him. “I’ll be back in a little bit. I forgot something.”
“Something?” he asked, brow creeping up even as a frown formed.
“Something,” I repeated, because even now I couldn’t help but prove Eva right and avoid talking about the fact that I was going to meet my boyfriend so he could fuck the sense out of me. Raf wasn’t exactly the most attentive sexual partner, but whenwe were both riled up enough, the fireworks were more than enough to make up for the times I was left high and dry.
“Let the man get laid,” Eva said, glancing at my phone before snagging a taco. “Maybe we’ll have a chance to finish what you started...after I eat.”
Eli blinked and then sighed. “Right, yeah. Raf?”
“Well, who else?” I asked, trying to sound casual even though I felt anything but.
“Right,” he said, taking a taco and a few containers of salsa and pico. “Tell him...well, anyway, have fun.”
Yeah, I was not going to tell Raf that Eli said hi. I didn’t know what it was about them, but they had taken an instant dislike to each other. Eli was careful not to talk about it too much, but Raf was pretty obvious. As far as I knew, neither of them had started anything with the other, but there was always tension and a stiffness when they interacted. I’d never asked what the problem was, content to pretend nothing was going on, so I didn’t have to get the answer.
“I’ll text you when I’m on the way back,” I told him as I grabbed my keys from the counter where I’d dropped them with the bags of food. The last thing I needed was to wander in on them having sex again.
“You don’t have to text to come back to your own home,” he said with a frown.
“I know, but at least this way I don’t risk coming in and seeing more of you than I need to see,” I told him. Want to see, sure, but need? No, I needed to see less of him in that way. Keep him distinctly not sexual in my mind, or I was going to spiral out of control at some point.