Page 44 of All My Witches
All I could do was nod. “Okay, but I think we should head back downstairs. I’m guessing we all had an occurrence like this, and we’re about to head to our nextadventure.”
“I’ve been traumatized,” Landon complained, groaning as he got to his feet. “This is the worst thing that’s ever happened to me. I know I said it before, but I really meant it, so I’m saying itagain.”
“You’ve beenshot.”
“It was stillworse.”
“I’ll have to take your word forit.”
“Oh, don’t worry, I’ll let you forgetthis.”
I had no doubt he was telling thetruth.
* * *
So… she’s sleeping with both the father and the son? That’s gross. I guess I should thank my lucky stars that she didn’t add in the grandfather. Wait a second. Is that the grandfather? He looks younger than the son. He’s much hotter than the others. I’m starting to think she’scrazy.
– Winnie on soap opera castingdecisions
Eleven
“Iknowwhere we have togo.”
Thistle, Clove, Marcus and Sam were waiting for us at the front door when we hit the bottom of thestairs.
“And where isthat?”
“An island.” Thistle held up a magazine. “Check thisout.”
I accepted the magazine and flipped it over so I could see the front cover. Aunt Tillie smiled back from the glossy page, a huge diamond in one hand, a lewd gesture displayed with the other, and a beautiful beach behind her. The headline read “Life’s Better on WitchIsland.”
Landon read over my shoulder. “Do I even want to know what Witch Islandis?”
“I’m pretty sure it’s our next destination, so we might need whatever information is in this article.” I planted the magazine in his hand. “Where did you findit?”
“Ourapartment.”
“Oh, did you have a disco ball,too?”
Thistle shook her head. “Waterbed. Sex music. Unlimitedporn.”
I pressed my lips together to keep from laughing. “Isee.”
“No happy ending,” Marcus added. “Also, it wasn’t porn. It was like a sanitized version of porn. It was like porn-lite.”
“You seem to know a lot about porn,” Clove pointed out. “I don’t think you would still be Aunt Tillie’s favorite if she knew about your pornpredilection.”
“It’s not apredilection.”
“It sounds like apredilection.”
“Stop saying ‘predilection,’” Landon ordered, his temper flaring. “We need to focus on this stupid island. That’s clearly where we have to go next. Thistle didn’t stumble across that magazine byaccident.”
Thistle’s expression was hard to read. She stared at Landon a long moment before shifting her eyes to me. “What’s hisproblem?”
“Music montage blueballs.”
“Hey!” Landon extended a finger. “We said we were never going to speak about itagain.”
