Page 70 of Crown of Light and Ashes
Nesilhan's grip tightens almost painfully. "And I appreciate a husband who understands the value of loyalty," she says sweetly, her possessiveness now blazing through our connection. "Rare as that quality might be among men of power."
The word '’husband’' from her lips sends an unexpected jolt through me—satisfaction mixed with something more dangerous. It reminds me too sharply of another time, another woman who called me by that title before everything turned toash and shadow.
Isil whispered it just like that, with the same mixture of claim and challenge, before she...
I force the memory down, but not before Nesilhan catches the sudden shift in my emotions through our bond. Her eyes flick to mine, confusion and concern replacing her jealousy for a moment.
"Loyalty," I muse, using the distraction to regain control. "An interesting concept from someone who shares her body with another man on our wedding day."
Ayla's eyes widen with delighted scandal. Nesilhan's face pales, then flushes with anger, her light magic flaring briefly at her fingertips.
"Perhaps we should continue this tour another time," she suggests, her voice tight with suppressed fury.
"Oh, but we are just getting to the interesting parts," I counter, though part of me recognizes I push too hard, letting old wounds influence present cruelty.
I use the moment to pull her closer, my lips brushing her ear. "Careful,hatun. Your jealousy shows." I keep my voice low enough that only she can hear. "One might almost think you care."
"I hate you," she whispers back, but through our bond, I feel the lie—her emotions are far more complex than simple hatred.
"Hate, desire—such close companions," I reply, though Isil's memory makes the words taste bitter. "Both keep you awake at night. Both make your heart race. Both made you scream my name last night when I—"
"Lord Kaan," Ayla interrupts, blissfully unaware of our whispered exchange. "What is that magnificent structure ahead? It looks almost like a temple."
I turn my attention back to our guest, although my awareness remains fixed on Nesilhan's turbulent emotions and her growing understanding of our bond's intimate nature. "The Shadow Observatory.Built to track celestial alignments that amplify our magic. Would you like to see inside?"
"I would love nothing more," Ayla purrs, pressing herself against me.
As we proceed toward the observatory, Nesilhan's jealousy continues to pulse through our bond in waves that are both delicious and disturbing. But beneath the entertainment lurks something more unsettling—the realization that my interest in Nesilhan's reactions goes beyond simple amusement. I am genuinely bothered by the idea of her attention straying from me.
It is a dangerous path, this mutual possessiveness. The way she says '’husband’' with such fierce ownership, the way her emotions blaze through our connection—it reminds me too much of bonds that end in blood and betrayal. A love that turns to poison, a name I swore never to speak again.
But Isil chose her path. The memory still cuts like a blade drawn across old scars.
I will not make that mistake again. I cannot allow myself to walk that path once more. Better to enjoy Nesilhan's jealousy as simple entertainment. Better to keep her as a conquest, a possession, rather than anything more dangerous.
Nesilhan is mine—by blood, by magic, by conquest. That will have to be enough.
Anything more is too dangerous to contemplate.
Anything more leads to ash and ruin and names whispered in moments of weakness.
Chapter Twenty
Bitter Reunion
Nesilhan
THE SHADOW OBSERVATORY looms before us, its obsidian dome cutting an imposing silhouette against the twilight sky. After weeks of navigating Shadow Court politics, I've learned to mask my emotions, I force my face to remain neutral despite the storm raging inside me. Kaan's arm feels like a brand beneath my fingertips, a constant reminder of both last night's surrender and today's humiliation.
"This structure dates back to the first Shadow Lord," Kaan explains, his voice dropping to that hypnotic cadence he uses when discussing shadow history. "The alignment of celestial bodies affects shadow magic's potency. On certain nights, when the stars align just so, our power increases tenfold."
"Fascinating," Ayla purrs, pressing herself against himshamelessly. "I've always been drawn to power. There's something so... primal about it."
I resist the urge to roll my eyes. Could she be any more obvious? The woman might as well climb into his lap and be done with it.
We enter the observatory, and I am momentarily distracted by its grandeur. The domed ceiling is crafted of crystal panels that appear black until Kaan waves his hand. Shadow magic pulses through the structure, and suddenly the panels become transparent, revealing a perfect view of the twilight sky above.
"It's beautiful," I admit before I can stop myself.
