Page 50 of When You Blush
“You got it.” He pulls me to my feet and kisses my forehead. He grabs his own phone, my purse, and we’re off.
“I shouldn’t have turned my phone off,” I mutter and drag my hands down my face as Blake hurries the short distance to the hospital. “But dammit, I took him all kinds of things to snack on yesterday. What in the hell did he eat?”
“We’ll find out, but he didn’t have to eatanything specific, baby. Sometimes sugar levels get wacky for no reason at all,” Blake says, taking my hand in his and kissing the back of it. “No more turning our phones off. We’ve learned that lesson.”
I take a deep breath and look over at him. God, he’s amazing. So calm and sure, and steady. Rock solid. I wish I could climb in his lap and cling to him like a freaking sloth on a tree.
And part of me feels so damn guilty because while I was having one of the best nights of my life, the man who raised me was headed for a diabetic coma, scared, and trying to reach me.
“Stop.” Blake shakes his head. “You didn’t do this, you didn’t know it would happen, and you can’t go back and change it now.”
“I know, but he was scared and trying to find me, and?—”
“Youdidn’t know, Harper. I won’t let you beat yourself up over this. No way.”
“I came home to take care of him, not fall into bed with you. I can’t just be selfish and fuck the hot doctor and forget that my father is sick and I’m the only one he listens to. I have to be there when he needs me. What am I even doing?”
Tears run unchecked down my face, and suddenly, Blake pulls into the hospital parking lot, but when he parks the car and walks to my side to open the door, he pushes his face to mine before I can get out.
“You’re a human fucking being, Harper. A woman with her own needs and feelings. You’re allowed to have apersonal life outside of your family. No one expects you to be at their beck and call.”
“Yes, they do,” I reply, my voice even and hollow, even to my own ears. “And theyshould, Blake. After all they’ve done for me?—”
“Loved you?” he demands, his eyes full of angry fire, his hands tight on my shoulders. “They love you. They expect love in return, not absolute fucking devotion, Harper.”
“But theyhaveabsolute devotion from me, Blake. Not out of some sort of misplaced debt or gratitude but because I know what it is not to be loved by the people who are supposed to love you. And the thought of losing Greg, or any of them, is something I can’t even entertain. I’m supposed to be here with them. They’remine, and I don’t have anyone in my life as precious to me as they are. This is important.”
I push my hands through my hair and lift my chin.
“I need to see himnow.” My voice is cold. I don’t want to fight with Blake or try to justify why I feel the way I do.
“Fine.” He backs up so I can get out of the car, but then he grabs my hand and turns me to him. “But you won’t refer to us asfucking the hot doctorever again, do you hear me?”
“That’s what I’m doing. That’s what this is.”
He pushes his nose to mine. “The fuck it is. Let’s go.”
He practically drags me through the automatic doors and up the stairs to the second floor where the main admissions is. He asks the nurse whereMr. Hendrix is, and when she confirms that I’m family, she says he’s in room 228.
“I’ll take it from here. Thanks for the ride.”
I start to walk past Blake, but he won’t release my hand.
“You’re not ditching me.”
“Blake, this is a family situation, and you have to work?—”
“I will take you over my knee right here and now if you don’t stop talking to me like I’m a fucking inconvenience,” he growls into my ear so I’m the only one who can hear him. “I know you’re upset, but goddammit, Harper. I didn’t do this either.”
I can’t look at him as I blink at tears and swallow hard. I love having him by my side, my hand in his. Being able to lean on him. But I don’t know if it’s smart to love it or to depend on it. Because I do everything myself. I always have. It’s who I am.
“I don’t do well with asking someone for help, and my emotions are all over the place. I’m scared.”
“Clearly. Come on.”
Chapter Thirteen
BLAKE
