Page 71 of When You Blush
He nods. “Yeah, this is a great picking spot. We can come back when they’re ripe.”
The fact that he hasn’t already written me off is a good sign.
“I’d like that. I make a really great huckleberry lemon loaf, and I’m dying to try it gluten-free. Anyway, there was a co-ed bachelor party for one of his friends that I was expected to go to. It was in Vegas.” I wrinkle my nose, and Blake snorts.
“Not a fan of Vegas?”
“Not particularly. Again, so cliché. Plus, his friends weren’t super warm and welcoming. I didn’t really want to go, but then one of our nurses got fired, and we were short-staffed, so I had to stay back and work. I thought he’d jump at the chance to go alone and do whatever the fuck he wanted in Vegas. I didn’t really care. I’dsochecked out of the relationship by then. But he waslivid.Said it made him look bad to his friends, and I’m unreliable, and my job is stupid, and blah, blah, blah.”
I roll my eyes, and it makes Blake laugh.
“You really didn’t care what he thought.”
“Not even a little. At that point, I walked on eggshells, mostly because I didn’t want more lectures, and I wasso tiredof living with him. I was saving to get my own place. But he went to Vegas, and I worked, and when he got home, he stopped speaking to me altogether. Like, I got the silent treatment forweeks.”
“He didn’t speak to you for weeks?”
“Three weeks. He’d glare, and he’d still check on me on his lunch breaks, but no words were spoken. It was fuckingbliss.”
Blake snorts. “I’m sorry, it’s not funny. What an asshole.”
“I can laugh at a lot now because he was so ridiculous. While he gave me the silent treatment, I found the traveling nurse job. It paid well, and I could leave Oregon and put some distance between me and him. I told my family I was breaking up with him, and they were glad. Especially because Ava spilled the beans about the cheating. I think all of the brothers wanted to kick his ass.”
“Iwant to kick his ass, sugar.”
I laugh. “He was supposed to go on a work trip, and I was going to leave then. I know it sounds chickenshit, but he owned a gun, and he was so unstable sometimes that I didn’t trust that he wouldn’t hurt me when I told him it was over.”
“Smart girl,” Blake says, kissing my head.
“But just three days before that trip, Nathan decided the silent treatment was over.”
“Shit.”
“Yeah. He started in on one of his lectures, and I completely shut it down. I grabbed a few things—most of my stuff was already packed and shipped ahead to Ava—and I told him that he was never allowed to speak to me again, and I left. I’ve never seen him, or heard from him, since then.”
We walk over a bridge where a waterfall runs through and stop to take it in.
“I already had trust issues,” I say to him as he leans his back against the railing, listening to me. “And then hehappened, and it really made me second-guess myself and my instincts.”
“He was a lying asshole, and it took him a while to show you exactly who he is.” Blake tucks a piece of my hair behind my ear. I notice he does that a lot when he wants to touch me, and I kind of love it. “But you got away, Harper. You stood up for yourself, and you ended it.”
I blow out a breath, listening to the water. “Yeah. I should have done it sooner. I also need to apologize because I never should have said what I did this morning. I know that you’re not the same person. That was an instinctual moment for me after what I went through with Nathan. I know, in my heart of hearts, that you’re nothing like that man. You’d never intentionally hurt me, but it’s a trauma response. It’s been so ingrained after those two years that sometimes I just react, even if it’s not what I really think.”
Blake glances at the waterfall as if he’s thinking, and for a heartbeat, I worry that he’s about to call this whole thing off.
“We’re still learning each other,” he says. “Relationships aren’t easy. I will tell you that Idon’thave the patience of Job. I can lose my temper now and again. Mostly when someone I love is hurting or if things don’t go right at work.”
“I can be a downright bitch when I’m hangry,” I inform him, and he chuckles and drifts his finger down my arm. “And I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’m a smart-ass.”
“I might have noticed.” He laughs again when I narrow my eyes at him. “I’ll keep you fed, sugar. I won’teverdisrespect you the way you have been. I’d never intentionally hurt you. Infidelity doesn’t interest me. In fact, it pisses me off.”
“Right? If you want to fuck someone else, that’s fine, but break it off with the one you already have first. It’s not hard.”
He nods, a smile tickling his lips. “He’s an absolute fucking idiot, Harper. I’m grateful because now you’re mine, and I’ll never make the mistake of fucking it up with you like that, but what a complete moron.”
You’re mine.Why does that make me so hot?
“Yeah.” I toss my hair over my shoulder. “Iama catch.”
