Page 29 of Quarantined
I stare at her mouth. I don’t know for how long, but I can’t look away. I can hardly breathe as I dip down and brush my lips to hers, very softly.
Raven doesn’t say anything.
I kiss her again. This time Raven puts her hand on my cheek. She raises her face to kiss back as I lean in to press my lips on her. I take in a sharp breath.
“Don’t leave me, Milo.” Raven murmurs against my lips, eyes still closed.
I don’t want to, but I have to. I can’t stay here any longer.
Shit.
What did we do?
I kissed her.
Then I kissed her again.
And she kissed me.
I shake my head. “Go to sleep. We will talk about this later.” I pull up the covers and leave the water on her night table, along with the envelope.
I wanted to see her face when she opened the gift. But I have to leave early in the morning. I am meeting up with the gang on campus. We are working on presentations all day. At night, we are leaving for Philadelphia. We have investor meetings lined up, so I am missing my classes this week. We will be traveling between Philadelphia and DC, and returning on Thursday.
I don’t want to wait till Thursday to give her the envelope. Tonight gave me a reality punch of how much I need Raven. I can’t be with her, but hopefully, this carefully planned itinerary and the fashion show will tell her how much I care for her. How much I value her. How often I think of her.
The itinerary includes the confirmation numbers for her open-ended plane tickets. The envelope also includes a list of other activities that Raven likes. Along with other things, I bought her a ten class package for French Cancan dance lessons, something she has been dying to learn. I spent days researching activities, all close to where Theressa is staying.
This trip to Paris will propel her career. She will gain experience working at her mom’s shop, putting together displays and dressing models. Once her outfit is showcased at the fashion show, it will look great on her resume, increasing her chances for FIT.
After that kiss, the last thing I want to do is leave her. I meant it when I told her that we will talk about it later. We will talk through this.
With just another kiss on her forehead, I force myself to close the door to the sleeping beauty’s room and head to my own bedroom.
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Milo
I have barely heard from Raven in the last couple days.
She is not a confrontational person. Maybe she doesn’t want to talk about the kiss, or maybe she was mad that I left. But at the very least, I assumed she would still text me to thank me for the envelope.
No such luck.
I did try to talk about the kiss. But her unresponsive text messages are making it difficult. This situation is complex, much like Raven herself.
That girl is a living paradox. She can curse, party, be carefree, use humor, and act like a little spitfire. Then she turns it around and acts like a mature adult, responsible, well put together, articulate with words yet reserved with her feelings. Sometimes I don’t know what to make of her. She is an enigma.
All of my friends know that Raven has a crush on me. I suspect Reid knows too. I always assumed she would grow out of it. Everyone did. They all thought I humored her while ignoring her silly crush.
The truth is, ignoring her feelings has been torture for me. I have developed a level of respect for Raven that is unparalleled to any other person on this planet. Yet, her parents trusted me with her care. I am her legal guardian, and that’s how the world sees us, members of the same family. For fuck’s sake, I cannot be her boyfriend if I am attending her PTA meetings and signing her permission slips.
If we were ever to be more, it would be a scandal of epic proportions. We have too many family friends and too large of a social network. The gossip would spread like wildfire in our community.
Everyone would jest and sneer behind our backs. It would be humiliating for Raven, Reid, and Mia, along with the rest of our family.
But since that kiss, I can’t seem to care about all of those valid reasons. It was barely even a kiss. I keep hearing Raven say that she loves me and to never leave her. It’s tearing me up.
I called her on Monday after my investor meeting. She didn’t pick up or return my call. Instead, she texted me the next day.
