Page 67 of Isolation
I have always known that Raven doesn’t throw tantrums because she is slow to react. But that doesn’t mean shewon’treact. It just takes her longer to process.
So, I feel cautious about giving in to her request. “How imperative is it for me to answer this?”
“How imperative is it for me to trust you?” Raven retorts.
“Yes,” my response is almost immediate. “I spoke dirty to Alexa.”
Raven gives me a curt nod. “Thank you for being honest.”
I gave in, but I don’t know of her ability to process. She is so fucking stunted sometimes.
It’s like watching a child take their “emotional” first steps as they learn to walk in a new realm that they recently discovered. “Rave, are you jealous of Alexa?”
“Yes,” her response is quick and definite. Then she adds, “Yes, I believe I am.”
I am quiet for a few moments. “You know, I wouldn’t be able to deal with it if the situation were reversed.” I am jealous when someone even breathes near her. “If you are uncomfortable with Alexa—”
“Milo, stop,” Raven cuts me off. She looks up at me with a frown tugging at her lips. “I’d never come in between your friendship.”
Of course, she wouldn’t. Compassion and empathy run deep inside her. Raven always tries to understand everyone else’s perspective. Even after everything I have done, she is still trying to understand me instead of writing me off.
Without making things more awkward or dwelling on the past, she shoots off her next question. “Have you ever had any STDs?”
“No.” I take out my house key as we approach our front door.
“When was the last time you took an STD test?” she asks curiously.
I contemplate for a moment as I mull the answer over. “Four years ago.”
“What!” Raven exclaims. “Four years is a long time. How do you know you’re clean?”
I know the thoughts that are running through that pretty little analytical head of hers. I start laughing at how she is cringing. “Trust me, Rave. I’m clean.”
“Even if you use a condom, they can break,” she protests my rationality. “Everyone thinks they are invincible until they are not.”
“I don’t think I am invincible.”
“Then why won’t you entertain the possibility that you might have an STD?”
“Because there has only been one person in the last five years, unless you have an STD that you’d like to report. However, I already know that you don’t. A copy of your last physical was lying around while your dad was treating you. I might have peeked at it.”
Raven freezes right as I turn the lock to the main door, surprised by my revelation. Actually, surprised might not be the right word. Shocked. Speechless. Stunned.
I hold the door open for her. She hesitates before stepping inside, quietly processing the words while crossing the threshold into the living room.
I have to go back to the split-level, but I walk Raven up the stairs to her room.
“F-four years? I-I… how do you expect me to believe that? I mean… how did you even remember how to do it—”
I tilt my head towards her with a cocky grin. “It’s just like riding a bicycle.”
Raven still looks shocked with her mouth wide open. She suddenly blurts out, “You must have jacked off all the time.”
My chest rumbles with laughter at her cute little face. Oh, I did. All the fucking time, and to a very specific dark haired girl.
“I mean… I don’t understand. Why did you go so long? Nothing was even going on between us…” she wavers off, not sure how to finish the sentence.
I lift a bored shoulder at the thought. “I have already had all the experience in the world. Friends with benefits. Casual dating. No matter what I did, it was always an empty fuck. Once we got together I realized exactly how empty those fucks really were. Sex simply felt hollow.”
