Page 138 of Architecti
She’s more than mad at me.
How dare she.What exactly does she expect from me?To give up everything?Make myself completely at her whims and in need of her protection?
“Hi,” I say, and have to force myself not to sound shitty.To at least give her a chance to explain why she’s here.
She won’t look at me when she speaks.“Could we please continue our study?Finals are imminent, and I would like to continue with our deal, should you see fit to want that.”
“Is that meant to be an apology?”
This makes her head snap up, her expression thinning.“And what exactly am I supposed to be apologising for?”
I huff.“Oh, I don’t know, maybe the fact you know I can’t read that contract without you.So you punished me by withholding the one thing I need.”
She shoves past me into my apartment.“Well, don’t worry, I put my favour in jeopardy, too.So I guess we’re both fucked now.”
“Mature, real fucking mature.A bit like your demands, your expectations.You want more from me than I can give.And when I didn’t give it you, you went dark.Walked away like a child instead of talking this through.”
“What the hell have I demanded from you?Other than meeting your half of our deal?”
I close the door and stride into the living room area after her.She’s pacing.Wearing lines into my carpet where her boots grind into the floor.
“You don’t have to use words to make demands, Midnight,” I say.
She stops still.“You fucking hypocrite.”
“I beg your pardon.”
She sniffs, wipes her forehead and glares at me.“And you don’t have to use words to tell me you have feelings for me.”
I baulk.How are we here again?
“This was supposed to be a deal.I help you win the favour, and you help me break my contract.You agreed to that.”
She flings her hands up.“Neither of us knew that fucking you brought the runes out.Things change, Lucy.That’s part of being human.”
“I’m no?—”
“Don’t you fucking dare pull that shit with me.You feel, therefore, you have human experience.”
I shake my head.“Your feelings won’t leave you powerless, vulnerable.”
She scoffs at me.“How can you know so little about mortals?Don’t you get it?Don’t you understand what happens to us when we fall in love?”
I fall silent, her words sinking in.Finally, after what feels like an aeon, I speak.
“You’re in love with me?”My eyes sting hot and watery.
“You think you’re so different.”She’s snarling.Furious with me because she loves me.She resumes pacing and ranting.“Humans don’t have crystalline hearts, no, and our power doesn’t rest inside them, but fuck, it might as well.”
“What do you mean?”I say and step closer.Her bright blue eyes are all flames and passion.
She shakes her head at me.“You set yourselves apart like you’re so fucking different.But when a mortal truly falls in love, they may as well rip out their beating heart and hand it to their loved one.That’s the power another holds over us.Love is making yourself wholly vulnerable.It’s giving yourself to another.There’s no one more capable of hurting you than the one you’re in love with.It’s why Aurelia broke me… and it’s why having you in my life remade me.”
Her words cut me so deep, my crystalline heart shivers.How is it she can penetrate my defences without me noticing?I stiffen as my chest squeezes; I swear hairline fractures form on the surface of my heart.
She is danger.
She is my ending.
