Page 139 of Frozen Hearts
“Grayson, is that you, dear?”
“Yeah, Gran. It’s me,” I respond as I step into her room and softly close the door behind me.
“It’s late, I was growing worried,” she chastises.
It’s 11 a.m. and she didn’t know I was stopping by today. “Sorry, Gran. I didn’t mean to worry you.”
“Come sit with me.” She pats the arm of her worn armchair, and I lean in to press a kiss to her temple before taking the spare seat beside her.
“How are you today?” I ask, casting my eyes over her. She looks the same as she always does these days. Frail. I remember thinking she was elderly andpast itwhen I first moved into her house after Dad went to prison, but now her skin is wafer-thin. I can see the blue veins through it, and when I touch it, it feels as though it will slough off in my hand.
“Old,” she answers.
A rare smile graces my lips, albeit it’s fleeting; a brief moment where the turmoil that eats away at me is suspended in time. Gran is one of the few people who make me feel genuine serenity. One of the few I can stand to be around these days. Her presence has always been a comfort to me. I barely have any memories of my mom, so Gran is the only maternal figure I’ve ever really known.
Usually, coming to see her grants me a peace I rarely get these days, but today that sense of calm is absent, the storm brewing within me too chaotic to be tamed.
I thought dragging Riley under my roof would grant me closure, but it’s only opened a floodgate of emotions I can’t seem to contain. All the unresolved anger that has been festering like magma inside me for years has bubbled to the surface, exploding in a devastating eruption of lava and destroying everything in its path, including my friendship with Logan if I don’t sort shit out soon.
Shouldn’t time have mended the wounds and smoothed over the scars left by her betrayal? Instead, the pain is as fresh as it was the day the judge delivered Dad’s sentence. In my mind, I replay the moments from the past when my feelings for Riley were simpler, back when she was the object of my teenage infatuation and not the lying temptress chained up at home, tormenting me without even having to be in the same room.
And yet, despite it all, she still drives me as wild as she used to. I didn’t expect her presence to affect me as strongly as it is, butfuck, every time I lay eyes on her, I want to strangle or fuck her. Or both. I never anticipated I’d feel so conflicted when I saw her again. So torn. It should be simple. Itissimple. I hate her. The rest of it is… my body’s physiological reaction to her. Nothing more.
That old infatuation is long gone. Smoke in the wind. Scorched embers torched in the flames of her spitefulness.
“How was school?” Gran asks, distracting me from thoughts of Riley. “Are those kids still being bullies?”
I sigh, not wholly surprised by her question. More often than not these days, her brain is stuck in the past.
“No. You were right, they moved on to other things.”
She reaches over to pat my leg. “I knew they would. People like that… if you don’t give them any response, they get bored and move on to the next scandal.”
Yeah, or the school year ends and we all go our separate ways, and I enroll in college under Gran’s maiden name.
Fuck. It’s been a long time since I thought about my final year of high school. What a shitshow that turned out to be. I went from Mr. Popular to the new kid whose dad embezzled thousands of dollars. Even after I moved schools, kids still knew who I was; what my dad had done. And unsurprisingly, no one wanted to hang out with me. I was teased relentlessly. Treated by the other kids as though I was the one who had committed the crime. The moment news of my father’s arrest went public, I’d been ostracized at my old school, and it was no different at this new one.
Hence why I changed my last name when applying to colleges.
Gran’s wrinkled hand moves to cup my cheek. “You look tired, my dear. You’re taking on too much. Helping me with the company, school, and all that while still dealing with your father’s absence.”
“It’s not too much, Gran.”
She shakes her head, not believing me. “You think I don’t see that hatred eating you up inside? You’ve been through a lot these last six months, Grayson. Your life has changed irreparably, and no one can blame you for being angry, dear, but don’t let it fester and spoil. It will rot you at your core if you don’t find a way to let it go. Life hasn’t been easy on you, losing your mom at such a young age, and now your father, but holding on to the pain of it all won’t do you any good.” She taps my chest, a wizened glint in her eye. “How can there be any room for love in that heart of yours if it’s so full of anger?”
“You’re the only woman I need room to love,” I appease.
Guffawing, she shakes her head. “Don’t be daft, boy. You’re eighteen. You should be falling in love multiple times over.” She reaches over to squeeze my hand, a surprising urgency behind the gesture. “Promise me, Grayson, that you won’t close your heart off to love.”
My eyes search her beseeching ones, and I know it’s a lie when I say, “I promise.”
“Good.” She pats my cheek like she didn’t just try to impart some deep wisdom. “Now help an old lady to the bathroom. Tea goes through me like water through a fire hydrant these days.”
“TMI, Gran,” I mutter, too low for her to hear with her poor hearing. I help her to her feet, remaining close as she ambles over to the bathroom with her walker.
“Do you need help?” I ask. “Or I can call someone.”
“I’m not an invalid, Grayson. I’m perfectly capable of using the latrine on my own.”
