Page 73 of Ember and Eclipse
Gods, he was warm. She’d forgotten how deliciously heated he could be. She fidgeted only a little, turning her head to press her ear against his chest. “Mmhmm,” she hummed.
He hesitantly put his arms around her before rubbing small circles on her back through the soft fabric. Tears came unexpectedly, rolling across the bridge of her nose and down his chest. She tried to move away so as not to cry all over him, but he held her in place with a firm pressure. Only when she relaxed did he continue his ministrations.
And he didn’t say a single word. No quips, no asking her to explain herself. He occasionally wiped the wetness away with a brush of his thumb. And that made her cry even harder because it was everything she needed, and she didn’t know why. When the tears stopped sometime later, she apologized for getting him wet.
“There is nothing to apologize for here.” He cleared his throat, his voice taking on a lighter tone when he said, “You’ve almost killed me... what was it, three times? And burned me. I think this is all very minor comparatively.”
A small smile came unbidden to her. “I won’t apologize for any of that.”
“I assumed as much.”
“But I do regret one thing,” she said, her tone dropping into a whisper.
“Oh?”
“I never thanked you. For coming for me, for avenging me. You were willing todiefor me—more than once.” Her voice became raspy. “Just… no one has ever cared the way you have. You terrify me too,” she confessed.
His hands stilled on her for the briefest of moments before he continued.
Right when she was on the verge of sleep, he finally spoke again. “My favorite color is green, by the way.”
It took a moment for the words to filter through her awareness and settle.
“Mine is too,” she murmured, the smallest of smiles playing on her lips. He merely continued to rub her back, and feeling altogether safe, she drifted off to sleep.
Chapter XLII
Whensheawoke,shedidn’t move right away. Her sleep had been a deep and dreamless rest that left her momentarily confused when she awoke. The hot skin she was pressed to left the side of her face and neck feeling flushed. Even more, a firm palm was against her backside, accidentally or otherwise, having pulled her nightgown up to press against her bare cheek.
She cleared her throat and felt the exact moment he awoke, his breathing changing. His hand moved from off her skin to rub at his face, and she pulled the slip down with one hand.
“Though small,” his morning voice was impossibly deeper, “this bed is rather comfortable. I don’t think I’ve slept that well in a long time.”
“Oh?”
“Hmm.”
She moved, making to get up, only to realize how entangled they were. And not only that but against her stomach was a hardening mass. “I, uhm, need to get up.”
Chancing a look at him was a mistake. Devdan was looking at her like she was something to be devoured. He moved his hands in a position of surrender, and she gave him a tight-lipped smile before she moved off him as quickly and dignified as she could. Without looking back, she knew his eyes were on her as she grabbed clothes and left the room.
Herroom.
With him inherbed.
But now…
She pulled the tunic over her slip and tugged on the pants before lacing up her boots. Choosing two knives from her damaged belt, she moved toward the entry. She needed to get out of the house. She needed air and a moment to think.Alone.
Pausing at the door, she looked back into the cottage, but there was no movement from her bedroom. She considered letting him know where she was going but thought better of it. He’d be able to find her no matter where she went anyway.
Making quick work of throwing the rope ladder over the side, she was down and across the water in record time.
Usually, she had specific tasks laid out for her day or week. Forage for certain foods, plant seeds for the ones she ate a lot of, practice her knife throwing, swim in Aloysius’ swamp, and see how long it took him to frighten her. But she was so scatterbrained that she couldn’t think of anything. Shedidneed to forage for food. The mushrooms she had collected before being taken were mostly bad now, and Devdan had used what was still good in his soup. Which was perfectly reasonable, and yet she felt a prickle of something that did not feel reasonable in the least.
Devdan had given her the option, control of whether she wanted him in her life at all. And after everything, she wasn’t sure why she couldn’t tell him to leave. It would be easy. Just five words. ‘I want you to leave,’ and he would be out of her life.
He’d said that their bond couldn’tmakethem feel. And she knew he wasn’t lying, which left only one conclusion—some part of herwantedthis. Some part of her wantedhim. The truth of it sang in her chest, a humming warmth that felt almost akin to her magic.
